Limerick Poems
Poem Details | by Margarita Lillico |
Categories: humorous,

Pat The Poet


Once Pat was approached at the corner street By Johnny, with his offer, indiscreet. She pulled out her poet's wit With sharp metaphoric grit, And blew his macho off into dead meat. March 30, 2023 Sponsor: Line Gauthier Bite Size contest

Poem Details | by Gershon Wolf |
Categories: humorous, international, leadership, satire,

Mr Netanyahu Slams Mr Biden

  The old fool can't even spell 'embarrassed'
  Joe Biden really thinks he can scare us
    He claims he's the boss here
    Though his vision's not clear
  Threatens to send K Harris to Paris


Poem Details | by Daisy Ward |
Categories: fun,

BUNNY P LOVE

They called him Bunny P. Love
Because he always wore this pink glove
He often moon walked and prep
And all the ladies loved his step
His spins and moves created a dove

Poem Details | by Daisy Ward |
Categories: fun,

GUFF MACDUFF

An opera singer name Guff Macduff
When he sings he tries to stuff
All his tunes in such short time
Even when he drinks red wine
Guff Macduff was just a cream puff

Poem Details | by Daisy Ward |
Categories: hair, men,

SAMSON'S HAIR

Samson had some gorgeous hair
Everyone assumed he had flair
Then a woman took his pride
Hair was cut, he broke then cried
Seeing his strength return, gave them a scare


Poem Details | by Clifford Villalon |
Categories: anniversary, birthday, celebration, children, engagement, family, friend,

Box Of Litted Wishes

Many years I kept you in a box
Box of memories that knocks
Birthdays and occasions you come alive
All day, like roses, I count you in five
Candles I lit, my love for you rocks!

Poem Details | by Linda Alice Fowler |
Categories: funny, humorous, hurt, husband, silly, voice, wife,

Kill the Shrill

there was a young man from Seville
whose wife's voice was chillingly shrill
	he said please shut up
	he’d more than enough
sending him looking for advil!

(caveat: no endorsement of product intended)

Poem Details | by Robert Gorelick |
Categories: animal, appreciation, humor,

Suzanne's Impish Maltese

Eyes gleam onyx-black, white silky hair gently flows
Pampered with kisses, hugs and chic bows
It's Suzanne's impish Maltese
The first lap dog, from Old Greece
Sparking heart-rending love which glows, spreads and grows

3/22/23
For SuZ

Poem Details | by Ralph Protsik |
Categories: animal, dog, humor,

The Mutt

A mutt may show up with a rat
Do some terrible things to your hat
But he’s happy for sure
Just to roll in manure
And so grateful that he’s not a cat

Poem Details | by Linda Alice Fowler |
Categories: 2nd grade, 3rd grade, funny, humorous, nursery rhyme,

Snory Cory

there was a boy named Cory
one night he claimed great glory
	his moniker came
	he arose to fame
his snoring laudatory

Poem Details | by Daisy Ward |
Categories: animal, humor,

THE LITTLE HORSE

A horse was the smallest of all
But he also long to be tall
So, he stretched everyday
Stood on bails of stacked hay
Until he stumbles and fall

Poem Details | by John lawless |
Categories: drink,

Raise the Bar

In a bar room they boldly contested
Though both were quite fully breasted
On the wall who’d pee higher
The dame or her squire
He lost when "no hands" was requested

John G. Lawless
©3/22/2023

Poem Details | by Panagiota Romios |
Categories: celebration,

WORLD LIMERICK DAY TODAY




Afraid to be unsupported.
With not posting, she cavorted.
Till a spirit did appear, 
Saying, cease all fear. 
With that, she penned undaunted!

 3/21/2023


Write a limerick to celebrate this day, do!





Poem Details | by Ralph Protsik |
Categories: animal, dog, humor,

The Spaniel

A Spaniel that uses its head 
Can tell when its owner’s unfed 
So instead of a duck
That is down on its luck 
Will deliver a pizza instead

Poem Details | by Andrew Crisci |
Categories: april, beauty, environment, friend, health, morning, song,

My Ode To April

Restfulness was for the body's good, 
bright and lively are the roses;
my aria has powerful tones! 
Martha smiles, today she's dressed in red;
she invites me in to taste her sweet bread!

Poem Details | by Andrew Crisci |
Categories: anxiety, confidence, culture, feelings, humor, morning, sexy,

Good Looks Can Generate Sentiment

Espresso is brewing: that's my fix,
not my expensive Rolex;
this Ralph Lauren suit is elegant.
Good looks can generate sentiment;
worry, rush and stress perplex!

Poem Details | by Gershon Wolf |
Categories: food, silly, word play,

South Asian PB and J

  Creatures from the deep blue lagoon
  Surrounded the sleeping baboon
    They poked him in the belly
    Out came strawberry jelly
  Opened up a brand New Delhi!

Poem Details | by Gershon Wolf |
Categories: humor, love hurts, passion,

Romeo and Juliet - Update

  Romeo was hiding in an alley
  And yet Juliet found him, by Golly
    They made love with passion
    Each with their blue mask on
  (Then) died of COVID ~ a fitting finale

Poem Details | by Jim Slaughter |
Categories: humor,

Limerick: Twenty-three skidoo

Flapper Shirley Shively sighed and thought, how could she?
She'd love to do that hootchie-kootchie dance, but would she?
Though the boys she loved to tease,
She was, sadly, quite obese.
Surely Shirley Shively shouldn't shimmy, should she?

Poem Details | by Richard Breese |
Categories: destiny, growing up, humor, humorous, science fiction, stars, surreal,

superstar

lola smalanna was fine

until she turned about nine

when mother brings home

an eclectic tome

and local stars misalign.

Poem Details | by Jim Slaughter |
Categories: humor,

Limerick: Old Doc Quackenbush

Poor old Doc Quackenbush is gone,
How he happened to fall down that well is unknown.
When they found him he was dead,
His obituary read,
"He should have tended to the sick and left the well alone."

Poem Details | by Earl Schumacker |
Categories: adventure, celebration, confusion, drink, holiday, identity, silly,

Mountains Of Florida


        Traveling the mountains of Disneyland
        Much higher than those found in Ireland
        When you’re drinking ale
        It’s like reading braille
       And doesn't much matter what car you're in


Poem Details | by Richard Breese |
Categories: beach, fish, funny, humor, humorous, ocean, sea,

shock wave

local sponge diver big deel

lacking personal appeal

jumped into a lake

procured a fish cake

and bumped an electric eel.

Poem Details | by Jim Slaughter |
Categories: humor,

Limerick for Saint Patrick's Day

A pre-alcoholic Irishman nearing the brink,
Was convinced by his wife he should go see a shrink.
And after only one session
He learned a valuable lesson,
He would much rather give up his wife than the drink.

Poem Details | by Robert Gorelick |
Categories: humor,

St Patrick's Day Blarney

On St. Patrick's Day, old boozehound Barney
Howls grand Gaelic airs at a pub in Killarney
Place a strong stout at his paw
And he'll howl Erin go braugh!
Yes, County Kerry folk are given to blarney!

3/17/23

Poem Details | by Sara Kendrick |
Categories: emotions,

Chair Potato





I have become a fat chair potato It would be nice to be a tomato Maybe a chili pepper hot Or habanero wrought Anything else to end this trapped woe
Written: 03/17/2023 Habanero pepper has 100,000 to 350,000 Scoville Heat Units.

Poem Details | by Linda Alice Fowler |
Categories: cute, men, silly, success, woman,

Sly Swimmer

there once was a sly swimmer bloke
whose manners were sure to provoke
	his form was unique
	a brand new technique
he mastered the women’s breaststroke

Poem Details | by Ralph Protsik |
Categories: animal, dog, humor,

The Doberman Pinscher

A Doberman’s known to be picky
With friends so to greet one is tricky
To kiss is a bummer
Undoubtedly dumber
Is to sneak up and give one a hickey

Poem Details | by JENNIFER PROXENOS |
Categories: humanity,

FROM A THUG TO A BLOATED SLUG

Hey Tom Cunningham, you could help bring Putin down,
Plastic surgery has made him into a legendary clown,
Ridicule him whilst highlighting his inhumanity,
Mock him but telling of his insanity,
Advise him his plastic surgeon should give him a frown

Poem Details | by James Edward Lee Sr. |
Categories: adventure, analogy, boy, child, cute love, funny love,

Carlin's

Rev up, rev up
engine roaring racing such
never boring lighting fast

birthday blast cars vroom-vroom
Carlin's runs on females hearts

3/13/23
Written words by James Edward Lee Sr. 2023©

Poem Details | by Robert Gorelick |
Categories: dog, humor,

Brix The Bullmastiff

In the bullmastiff's breast beats a heart of pure gold
A proud Saxon canine, true caring and bold
Ever steadfast, not trendy
Such an apt chum for Wendy
A real breed apart and a joy to behold

POEM OF THE DAY
3/14/23
(For Wendy Horder and her hunk of love Brix)
Written 3/13/23

Poem Details | by Linda Alice Fowler |
Categories: fun, funny, humorous, silly, wind,

Kilt Atilt

there once was a man from Kingsbury
who put on his kilt in a hurry
	in a bit of a flap
	he forgot his jockstrap
a chill wind put him in a flurry

Poem Details | by Linda Alice Fowler |
Categories: feelings, food, funny, image, self, silly, woman,

Mangia Mangia

there once was a woman named Mimi
she never would wear a bikini
	when she was asked why
	she didn’t blink an eye
said, “I’ve eaten too much linguine!”

Poem Details | by Panagiota Romios |
Categories: humor, life, world,

OF THE WORLDWIDE LIE

They told me there is no jackalope. I said, "your head is like a cantalope!" Ignorance and fear, better than a cold beer? Stupidity, like the virus! Wuhan ….leave it behind us! 3/10/2023

Poem Details | by Daisy Ward |
Categories: humor,

THE EGGS

The eggs were colorful and bright
They hide them way out of sight
There was a watchful eye
Who tried to act shy
Took the eggs and ate with delight