Limerick Poems
Poem Details | by Jan Allison |
Categories: humorous, water,

Head Boy



Live head-lice thrive on Peter's crown Head's itchy it's making him frown But young Peter's no fool Dunks his head in the pool He's hoping all the critters drown!

Poem Details | by Hilo Poet |
Categories: analogy, beach, holiday,

Can-be Beach, Fourth of July

Dear, get me a cocktail, ... those fruity ones,
Me with no glasses, ... No miss, errs or runs,
saluting sounds of conscience
smoking fumes are obnoxious
he strayed, two sunbathed girls, "Dears, it's the guns."


Poem Details | by Terry Miller |
Categories: humor,

Pool Fool

A witless young man named Abdul
one day dropped his phone in the pool.
With his face in the wet,
he could TikTok still get,
no need to dive in; he’s no fool!

Poem Details | by Patri Venkata Ramana |
Categories: crazy, fun,

Lazy James

Young James always appears to be lazy.
Due to inertness, his mind gets hazy.
To the pool, he makes a tread.
Into it, he dips his head.
Losing his grip, he topples. How crazy!



Poem Details | by Thomas Harrison |
Categories: animal,

Pigeon

Once, when younger at the beach,
Dad bought us an ice cream each.
A pigeon, alert,
pooed on dad’s dessert;
no more it tasted of peach!


Poem Details | by Jonathan Medida |
Categories: abuse, anger, anti bullying, childhood, hope, school, suicide,

Cruel School

By that pool, where the shadows did rule,
A confused kid, thought he'd end it cruel,
He plunged his weary head,
With a heart capped of dread,
But recalled he has homework for school.





Picture Prompt Poetry Contest: Poetry Contest
Sponsored by: Margarita Lillico

Poem Details | by David Crandall |
Categories: fun, humor, summer,

For My Eyes Only

In summer, I drag old bones to the beach.
High surf and bikini clad women teach
that, shining in the sun,
there are some kinds of fun 
that are for me, not my eyes, out of reach.

Poem Details | by Sandra Haight |
Categories: funny, inspiration,

On A Whim

Mom said there's no time for a swim! For sure, I was upset and grim. The day was so hot- Time for a quick shot! Dunked my brainy head on a whim!

Poem Details | by Howard Osborne |
Categories: rain, summer,

RAIN AGAIN

RAIN AGAIN

As the summer season takes over from spring
With limited hope for the warmth it may bring
A changeable climate like ours
Delivering regular showers
Means that a constant damp affects everything

Poem Details | by Chetta Achara |
Categories: humor,

En Pointe

There was a young man from Detroit 
Whose thinking they say was adroit 
He challenged the sun
To have some hot fun
Ended up with his head en pointe.

Poem Details | by Crystol Woods |
Categories: 1st grade, child, funny, humor, nonsense, water,

Swim At Your Own Risk




Swimming nude in the pool was Little Lou, In distress she yelled, ”MA! I gotta poo !” Ma was much too late. So the cowboy, Nate, stuck in his head and said, “Well, Howdy-DOO!”

Poem Details | by Howard Kerr |
Categories: angst, blue, dark, deep, fantasy, fate, perspective,

Upon A Pool

Blue pool had brave man quite transfixed
whose thoughts might seem muddled and mixed
dare he risk sweet life 
with deep pain and strife  
or ponder awhile in betwixt

Poem Details | by Gershon Wolf |
Categories: car, drink, giggle, technology,

Drop the Reins and Pour Me a Drink

    The dog days of summer, certainly here
    Every half-hour, another shot of beer
        Too lazy to move
        I’m stuck in a groove
    Glad my new car doesn’t need me to steer

Poem Details | by David Crandall |
Categories: humor,

Weighty Thoughts

Since you moved next door, I'm under your spell.
As you sunbathe in the yard where you dwell,
How I ponder as I look
on the weights borne by one hook!
I hope cold water will, such thoughts, dispel.  

Poem Details | by Peter Bryce |
Categories: humorous,

Pool Noodle

There once was a young boy named Stever,
Came down with a sudden head fever;
Grandma said,”stay in bed!”
Instead to pool he fled, 
‘Cause Stever just didn’t believe her. 


Poem Details | by Howard Osborne |
Categories: cool,

WATER TO DO

WATER TO DO

There was a young man called Fred
Who had a boil on top of his head
As a large inflamed spot
It became extremely hot
So dipped it in a cold pool instead

Poem Details | by Margarita Lillico |
Categories: humorous,

Dream Catcher

I have a sweet grandson named Steve, 
Inquisitive chap and naive, 
Pool or pond, his wish -
To scout out the fish, 
Dunked into Land of Make Believe. 

Poem Details | by Chetta Achara |
Categories: humor, political,

What you ::don't:: see is what you get

The “Green New Deal” will go down as the largest PONZI SCAM on a global scale! ~Jay McKinsey, 2023

There was a young man from the coast
Whose mind the Democrats stoked
With Green Energy scam
When he couldn't find sand
The man buried his head in the moat!

Poem Details | by Jaymee Thomas |
Categories: summer,

Poolside Peek

In his shirt of bright yellow nylon,
Nicky hung, with his curious eye on
A pool he bent over,
Cool water enclosure
Still, he's well-dressed with his smile on.





Poem Details | by Jack Ellison |
Categories: cute,

A Flutterby



Knew a delicate flyer named flutterby She'd fly backwards not like other butterflies Kept bumping into things But on AGT she could sing Sang opera brought a tear to my eyes

Poem Details | by Jack Ellison |
Categories: hilarious,

A Tiny Heinie


There once was a lass from Miami Poor girl, she had breasts that were tiny Quite squeezable though And wouldn't you know She also possessed a wee heinie

Poem Details | by Lisle Ryder |
Categories: creation, environment,

Invasive species

As our human population increases 
we risk becoming an invasive species.
   We are spreading with speed
   like an unwelcome weed,
so native creatures then suffer decreases.

Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: farewell, humorous, perspective, political,

oh for a second departure

Once simian stock from brambles
Orange buffoon whose ooze rambles
Orangutan clone 
On narcissist’s throne
Owns ape-man’s old brain in shambles

Poem Details | by Jan Allison |
Categories: farm, humorous,

A **** and bull tale - Risque Rhyme


New farmer whose first name is Guy Confesses he's using AI His cows are sans bulls But for lassies he pulls He uses his todger - AYE AYE!

Poem Details | by Randy Freie |
Categories: lust,

The Hot Spot

I just knew that I'd better not stop

Caressing her from bottom to top

It was getting real hot

When I hit the right spot

But by then I was too pooped to pop



Prequel to "Johnny on the Spot"

Poem Details | by John Lawless |
Categories: irony, political,

One Way Ticket

They say they’re on board, there’s no fuss
They just let the old man loudly cuss
Think no one will notice
It’s only the POTUS
Thrown under a big yellow bus

Poem Details | by Gershon Wolf |
Categories: pain, political, sick,

Here It Comes to Save the Day

     COVID just sank its fangs into Joe
     Will the disease let the old man go ~

        Return to the campaign 
        Or just add to his pain ~

     Perhaps now Joe will tell himself NO!

Poem Details | by Gershon Wolf |
Categories: innocence, military, money, murder, satire,

How Naive Can JD Be

       JD Vance will certainly get skewered
       For he came off as naïve, untutored

          Boosted the military
          Promoted prosperity

       Such naivete can get him murdered

Poem Details | by Gershon Wolf |
Categories: america, dark, moving on, political,

For 'the Good of the Party'


     The train’s pulling out of the station now
     Not everyone’s boarded the old cash cow

         The POTUS got left behind
         A sign of radical times ~

     'Wheels of progress' just ground him into chow

Poem Details | by Randy Freie |
Categories: humorous,

Johnny on the Spot

I lost my hair and I lost my pep 

That's why I lost the spring in my step 

But I couldn't go on

When my manhood was gone

And I lost my wife to Johnny Depp

Poem Details | by Thomas Harrison |
Categories: anger,

The Bully

A bully once roared in my face,
macho bluster, lacking all grace.
I said “Do you mind?
I think you might find,
your breath offends my personal space.”

Poem Details | by Jack Horne |
Categories: silly,

At the Zoo - very crude

He heard that the zoo was for sale;
a donkey and tiger he'd 'nail':
'I want' - to the lass -
'your pussy and ***!'
(And that's why he's banged up in jail...)

Poem Details | by Denis Bruce |
Categories: anger, silly,

Sting in the tale

There once was a donkey from Delhi 
Who dared call a tiger's breath smelly
Tiger  roared out in great rage
Which donkey could not assuage
And ended  up in tiger's belly

Poem Details | by R J. Elless |
Categories: humor,

No Tax


There was a scandalous lass. 
That let men handle her ***.
So, what can she say?
They all had to pay.
Although, she didn't add tax!

Poem Details | by Robert Gorelick |
Categories: animal, humorous,

Unsavory Lunch

A Bengal tiger has an uncanny hunch That he'll encounter a tasty beast to munch Finding an inedible Prey with fear he roars go away! Then runs to seek a more suitable lunch