Limerick Poems
Poem Details | by James Study |
Categories: age, birthday,

Eighty

Bacon and eggs each morning his treat
Chocolate and candy and all that's sweet
No helmet with pedal
No seat belt to meddle
Making eighty years old was no easy feat

Poem Details | by Justin Abdool |
Categories: devotion, heart, love, mother, mother son, ocean, thank you,

The Pearls in The Ocean

My mother is like the ocean
She gives a lot of devotion

So around her neck
I put pearls perfect

For all her heart's emotion

Syllables:

8,8,8
5,5


Poem Details | by Linda Alice Fowler |
Categories: christmas, funny, giggle, holiday, humor, silly, snow,

Snow Go

There once was a young girl named Flo.
She liked holidays quiet and slow.
	But Jolly Saint Nick,
	well, he came too quick
and poor Flo was left to clean up the snow.

Poem Details | by Khondwaniwn Crusader |
Categories: adventure, anxiety, change, character,

Obstacle

My family never allows me to read a book 
Every time I attempt to read a page they'll tell me to cook
So day and night  I sweat
But bitterness wipes of the wet 
Triumphantly it makes me do all the work

Poem Details | by Gershon Wolf |
Categories: car, change, horse, recovery from,

Old Bessie

  Old rusty Bessie just drove her last mile
  Went with a sputter instead of a smile
    No more brakes slipping
    No more gears ripping
  Think I'll relax with a horse for a while


Poem Details | by Tania Kitchin |
Categories: funny,

Santa's Mission

Santa knew he had a special mission
To make sure Putin's out of commission
With his sleigh of dynamite
Disguised as presents tonight
Down Putin's chimney upon ignition

Poem Details | by Robert Gorelick |
Categories: humor,

Birds Baked In Pies

Birds baked in pies, babies rocked out of trees
Kids all falling down from some dreadful disease
Young Hansel and Gretel
May wind up in a kettle
What tormented minds write stories like these?

12/4/22

Poem Details | by Jeff Kyser |
Categories: silly,

Hit the road

There once was a driver named Huck who found himself down on his luck. When he kicked the tires, he incurred her ire, got left by his self-driving truck.

Poem Details | by Justin Abdool |
Categories: angst, animal, pride, scary, visionary, voice, war,

The Lion Kings

Mufasa & Scar join forces
To kill evil in its courses

Angst to the hyenas
King and bro hit arenas

It is like riding all horses!

Syllables:

8,8,8
7,7

Poem Details | by Justin Abdool |
Categories: absence, angst, boy, cute, funny, kiss, visionary,

The Gigantic Boy

I knew a boy, who was a giant
He was on a council of miants

He was boisterous
A cute fool to us

So he left out of his, defiance!

Syllables:

9,9,9
5,5

Poem Details | by Linda Alice Fowler |
Categories: christmas, funny, giggle, humor, silly,

Loser

There once was a pudgy old elf 
he loaded the toys from the shelf
	filled the sleigh full 
	too heavy to pull
needed to lose half of himself

Poem Details | by Jack Ellison |
Categories: dog,

Can Dogs Talk And Think



Are dogs our long lost missing link Basically can they talk and possibly think At times they shock me Surely they can talk with me Pretty sure they have us all hoodwinked

Poem Details | by Valsa George |
Categories: care, hilarious, irony,

Duty Bound


Patient to doctor said so sore “I can’t bear this pain any more Kill me…I want to die My lips are going dry” Said doc, “For that I am called for”

Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: christmas, humorous,

It's Snow Joke


Poor Rudolph’s desperate to “go”
Resulting in bright yellow snow
He produces some brown
Making Santa Claus frown
And shouting Rudolph, No! No! No!

A Funny Christmas or December Holiday Limerick Poetry Contest

Sponsored by Tania Kitchin

12/02/22

Poem Details | by Sara Kendrick |
Categories: christmas,

Santa's Down





There is a rumor going around Santa is feeling quite blue and down The elves say he's in bed And he's covered his head But Mrs. Claus nowhere can be found
Just for fun/come to your own conclusions.

Poem Details | by Robert Gorelick |
Categories: humor,

Pooped Putin

In Moscow’s sewers earlier today
An urgent plot was hatched without delay
On his porcelain throne
Up Vlad’s rear flew a drone
And blew poor Putin’s butt far away

12/2/22

Poem Details | by Ann Peck |
Categories: christmas, fun, giggle, humor, memory, nonsense, tree,

A Shot of Christmas

What? she cried, the Christmas tree you forgot?
Worn-out excuse--you bought a whiskey shot!
                Forgot my glasses, see
                then really had to pee
But I sang carols to the whole blooming lot!

Poem Details | by Hat Bueckert |
Categories: christmas, funny,

Christmas Picket

Elves were on strike, it was Santas worst fear
Sick of long, late hours and forced Christmas cheer
Sick of being on shelves
What to give to these elves
When they only work one month in the year....


Dec 2, 2022

Poem Details | by Jack Ellison |
Categories: celebration,

My Brain Still Works



In spite of my age, my brain still works Thought by now I'd need a full time nurse I'm still clicking along Singing sixties songs To tell the truth it could be a whole lot worse

Poem Details | by Arlo Parker |
Categories: beautiful, child, joy, word play,

Princess Pretty

Once lived a sweet beauty named Paige
Even at six she was quite the sage
Always ready to strike a pose
A ready smile under a button nose
Her spontaneous laugh always the rage


+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+

Poem Details | by James Edward Lee Sr. |
Categories: analogy, appreciation, birthday, friend, friendship,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY WILLIAM EARL-



                    
happy birthday William Earl, how ya do-N where U at in this world
12/1/2022 Written words by James Edward Lee Sr. 2022©

Poem Details | by Becky Forbes |
Categories: joy,

Lim-Ode-er-ick to Unseeking Seeker




He pens from the Source, Unseeking Seeker
Words bring us Stillness and make us meeker
Conduit of truth
Secret-cracking sleuth
Ingest his words to make ego weaker


12.1.2022

Poem Details | by Becky Forbes |
Categories: celebration,

Lim-er-Ode to Tom Cunningham



Tom Cunningham tells the stories just right
Eyes drink his words in delicious delight
He takes us on rides
We want ne’er subside
We scream to his poems, “Gimme more. Quite!”


12.1.22



Poem Details | by Becky Forbes |
Categories: thanks,

Ode-er-ick to Jeff Kyser


There once was a poet named Jeff Kyser
All who partook of his pen grew wiser
Looked up brand new forms
Established new norms
He’s the wittiest wit, I surmiser


12.1.22

Poem Details | by David Bose |
Categories: humor, loneliness, money,

Refund, Please

Santa dropped in, was eager to pay,
But Viagra was up in the sleigh.
A tart doffed her teddy,
Said, "Santa I'm ready,
But don't think you'll be able that way."

Poem Details | by Matt Caliri |
Categories: christmas, funny,

Cheesy Christmas Limerick

Barn-ward we heard the reindeer's sneeze.
Smells of nutmeg and clove in the breeze. 
With Santa stuck in the John,
From dusk till about dawn,
Looks like we gave Big Red too much cheese.

Poem Details | by Christuraj Alex |
Categories: fun,

Recycled

The grown-ups did not feel, we thought,
We, students, never with them fought;
We recycled wastes, yet,
Out of these got cribs set; 
We have, truly, a new fact taught...!


01 December 2022

Poem Details | by W J Clarke |
Categories: christmas, humor,

Festive indulgence woes

At Christmas we feast to our hearts galore,
And can eat until our stomachs are sore,
If one’s gut should implode,
The bottom may explode,
Oh! My goodness! Do I have to say more?


30/11/22

Tania Kitchin

A Funny Christmas Limerick Contest

Poem Details | by Tom Valles |
Categories: animal, christmas, fun, funny, holiday, humor, humorous,

Rudolph's Run In

Officer please, I respect the police
Please issue a warning for my release!
Who knew a red headlight’s illegal?
I know they don’t show up on seagulls.
Oh,  I have presents in back for your niece!

written 11/30/2022

Poem Details | by Brian K. Bilverstone |
Categories: celebration, christmas, social,

November

November A small note concerning November. It’s the month for “Remember Remember.” Curb your Yuletide proclivities, Put a lid on festivities. Because Christmas belongs in December!

Poem Details | by Christuraj Alex |
Categories: fun,

Santa Slowed

By horse-cart when Santa Claus rode,
Through our untarred yoyo village road,
Axis like a dough disc,
Broke; Santa was at risk;
Lo! His expedition got slowed...!

30 November 2022

Poem Details | by Sara Kendrick |
Categories: addiction,

What Is Santa Up To Now





Someone told me what they saw last night A mirror reflecting some bright light Rudolph told Dasher 'tis true There was a line or two Oh! Santa's sleigh's mirror now turned white
After reading Andrea's limerick about Santa being drunk..Just for fun

Poem Details | by Robert Gorelick |
Categories: humor,

Good Ol' Tom's Maramite

As a child I would tremble and shudder with fright
Praying Please Lord not Aunt Beas's Marmalade tonight
Always slick, slimy and hard
Made of lime peels and used lard
I was still glad it wasn't Ol' Tom's Maramite

11/29/22

Poem Details | by David Bose |
Categories: humor,

Comet, Cupid, Vixen, and Flasher

Missus Claus had to trudge down to jail,
Once more toting with her Santa's bail;
Seems where people all shop
He let red trousers drop:
He enjoys showing biddies he's male.

Poem Details | by Justin Abdool |
Categories: cry, hate, humor, jealousy, longing, money, silver,

The Man Named Shane

I once knew a man named Shane
Who didn't have, a chain

He was so damn cold
Cuz he wasn't sold

That drove him so damn insane!

Syllables:

7,7,7
6,6