Poem Details | by
Jesse Rowe |
Categories:
bird, food, funny,
They said how she ate was absurd;
A "Fatso", they called her she heard,
And ever since then
That poor, baby wren
Just pecked at her food like a bird.
8.31.18
Contest: Any Animal or Creature Limerick
Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for
poems or see our other
baby Poems."
Poem Details | by
Gershon Wolf |
Categories:
animal, baby, night,
In Aussie-land dwell the marsupials
By night they paint the town connubial
They make them a joey
Named Zoey or Chloe
Neighbors jump for joy indubitable
Poem Details | by
Barbara Gorelick |
Categories:
funny
MrsCat, I'm bringing back your kitten
I'm completely done with baby sittin'
She cried all day
Not worth the pay
And , so sorry, we couldn't find her mitten
For the "Tell Me About It " contest
Poem Details | by
Jan Allison |
Categories:
baby, body, humorous,
My unfortunate uncle named Rick
Was endowed with a very small wick
But he was still quite able
To impregnate aunt Mable
Who gave birth to a son they called Dick
2nd April 2017
Poem Details | by
Jan Allison |
Categories:
baby, humorous,
Got married, my surname’s now Cotton,
Our baby’s name can’t be forgotten,
We called her ‘ Polly Esther’
(I’m considered a jester)
My family thought we were rotten!
11/06/20
Poem Details | by
Susan Gentry |
Categories:
brother, mother, old, technology,
Hill, By and Blow - the three Billies brothers
Were constantly fighting each other
Hill was the oldest
Blow was the boldest
By was the baby by another mother
May 5, 2018
Hillbillies, Bybillies and Blowbillies Contest, by Caren Krutsinger
Honorable Mention
Poem Details | by
Gershon Wolf |
Categories:
baby, clothes, fashion,
Prince Harry and wife's new son is named Arch
He was born in May instead of in March
He looks kind of cute
In his new white suit
I guess Meghan went easy on the starch
Poem Details | by
Tim Ryerson |
Categories:
funny,
Confessed to creator Geppetto
"Got a fetish, I think you should know
Often I fiddle
‘Round with my middle
Take a look-see how THAT baby grows!"
Sumitted for: Roy Jerden's contest
Poem Details | by
Jan Allison |
Categories:
baby, humorous, marriage,
The vicar surveyed her wide girth
Was scared that in church she’d give birth
He raised his eyebrows
Then rushed through their vows..
He wasn’t adept at childbirth!
Inspired by the poem ‘Decision Needed’ by Maurice Rigoler
13TH April 2016
Poem Details | by
Panya Chanthavong |
Categories:
baby, father son, kids, girl, love, mom, son,
Hey Son, I wrote this to warn you
In your whole life, many girls are coming through
You might have only girl to love her much over
But you have to remember that do not hurt your mother
She is my only girl too...
Poem Details | by
Richard Breese |
Categories:
angel, baby, child, child abuse, divorce, giggle, humor,
once a child with a rattle
enjoyed crawling around cattle
till its mother found out
and to her ex did shout
you lost your custody battle.
Poem Details | by
Jan Allison |
Categories:
drink, humorous,
When Asher-Leigh made fudge smoothie
It’s not one that you’d want to see
It looked like baby pooh
That you’d flush down the loo
I’m certain it’s no drink for me!
A funny Limerick Contest
Sponsored by Tania Kitchin
06/03/22
Poem Details | by
Jan Allison |
Categories:
baby, body, humorous, woman,
A gravid young lady named Prue
Was bursting to go to the loo
She crossed her legs tight
With all of her might
It’s what pregnant ladies go through!
21st June 2016
Poem Details | by
Tim Ryerson |
Categories:
funny,
Got referred to a female Urologist
After which I needed a Psychologist
"I'm a licensed physician
Now resume your position!"
Next appointment? Her sister Proctologist
Poem Details | by
Nyonglema Pisoh |
Categories:
baby, family, mom, mother, mother daughter, my child, my children,
Hiding in mummy's tummy, kicking happily away
I'm kissing you warmly, clapping and singing in play
They say in a few weeks
I'll be able to kiss your new cheeks
I can't wait for the morning I'll lift you in a sway
(c) Nyonglema
Poem Details | by
Nitesh Aggarwal |
Categories:
childhood, death, family, funny, husband, wedding, wife,
A baby, pious, was born by aide
He named it Gaias, and felt like a jade
While he cried,
Cause mommy died.
His wife hired yet another maid.
Poem Details | by
Larry Belt |
Categories:
funnyme, me,
If I had a shiny new nickel
I'd buy me another dill pickle
My wife thinks she knocked me up
Made me go pee in a cup
But pickle juice came out in a trickle
Poem Details | by
Jack Horne |
Categories:
childhood
As this poem was being written,
A small boy appeared to be smitten.
He loved his baby brother,
But then he asked his mother,
‘Please can we swap him for a kitten?’
Brotherly Love
Jack Horne
24th April 2011
Poem Details | by
Jan Allison |
Categories:
baby,
‘Damn Liar’! said Hillary to Bill
You told me ‘that girl’ was on the pill
Now she’s got a tum
As big as they come
You're the daddy, now ain’t that a thrill!
22nd May 2015
Poem Details | by
Nitesh Aggarwal |
Categories:
childhood, children, funny,
There once was a dream in my sleep
I was out in the fields with my sheep
I wanted to pee
Let it out with glee
I woke up with in a puddle in my keep.
Poem Details | by
Derrick Shane |
Categories:
care, cute love, funny love, kiss, love, lust, woman,
Your sheer arrogance makes me giggle
Your butt does the cutest wiggle
I really hope you like me
I want to call you baby
Or maybe my little piggle.
:)
Poem Details | by
Paul Schneiter |
Categories:
baby, humor,
CEO Andrew Sykes took a social crash dive
he asked a clerk when her baby would arrive.
"I'm not pregnant!" she exclaimed
her face was red and inflamed.
'Tis a miracle he fled her presence alive.
Poem Details | by
Jack Ellison |
Categories:
fun, tribute,
Eve, dear Eve, you are such a sweet lady
My heart skips a beat when you write me, oh baby!
I tingle and squirm
And mess up my perm
My thoughts could be considered a wee bit shady!
© Jack Ellison 2015
Poem Details | by
John Williams |
Categories:
children, funny,
Youngin Greg found an egg
Struck it with his mummy's peg,
Only taking one baby stroke
Out came the gooey yolk
Running down his leg.
Poem Details | by
Dane Ann Smith-Johnsen |
Categories:
family, husband, social, work
The Woes of a Househusband
There once was a rich attorney named Joyce.
She fought for women's lib with a strong voice.
Her husband raised their baby.
And cleaned their house like crazy.
As she approached the bar, he lost his choice.
© August 26, 2010
Dane Smith-Johnsen