Limerick Poems About Babies | Baby Limerick Poems
Poem Details | by Jesse Rowe |
Categories: bird, food, funny,


They said how she ate was absurd;
A "Fatso", they called her she heard,
And ever since then
That poor, baby wren
Just pecked at her food like a bird.

Contest: Any Animal or Creature Limerick

Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other baby Poems."

Poem Details | by Gershon Wolf |
Categories: animal, baby, night,

Paint the Town Connubial

In Aussie-land dwell the marsupials
By night they paint the town connubial
   They make them a joey
   Named Zoey or Chloe
Neighbors jump for joy indubitable

Poem Details | by Barbara Gorelick |
Categories: funny

Raccoon's Baby Sittin' Service

MrsCat, I'm bringing back your kitten
I'm completely done with baby sittin'
She cried all day
Not worth the pay
And , so sorry, we couldn't find her mitten

For the "Tell Me About It " contest

Poem Details | by Jan Allison |
Categories: baby, body, humorous,

Poor Wee Man

My unfortunate uncle named Rick Was endowed with a very small wick But he was still quite able To impregnate aunt Mable Who gave birth to a son they called Dick 2nd April 2017

Poem Details | by Jan Allison |
Categories: baby, humorous,

Name and Shame

Got married, my surname’s now Cotton, Our baby’s name can’t be forgotten, We called her ‘ Polly Esther’ (I’m considered a jester) My family thought we were rotten! 11/06/20

Poem Details | by Susan Gentry |
Categories: brother, mother, old, technology,

Billies Brothers

Hill, By and Blow - the three Billies brothers
Were constantly fighting each other
Hill was the oldest
Blow was the boldest
By was the baby by another mother

May 5, 2018

Hillbillies, Bybillies and Blowbillies Contest, by Caren Krutsinger
Honorable Mention

Poem Details | by Gershon Wolf |
Categories: baby, clothes, fashion,

A New Son Named Arch

Prince Harry and wife's new son is named Arch
He was born in May instead of in March
   He looks kind of cute
   In his new white suit
I guess Meghan went easy on the starch

Poem Details | by Tim Ryerson |
Categories: funny,

I Fear That Pinocchio -

Confessed to creator Geppetto
"Got a fetish, I think you should know
Often I fiddle
‘Round with my middle
Take a look-see how THAT baby grows!"

Sumitted for: Roy Jerden's contest

Poem Details | by Jan Allison |
Categories: baby, humorous, marriage,

Call the Midwife

The vicar surveyed her wide girth Was scared that in church she’d give birth He raised his eyebrows Then rushed through their vows.. He wasn’t adept at childbirth! Inspired by the poem ‘Decision Needed’ by Maurice Rigoler 13TH April 2016

Poem Details | by Panya Chanthavong |
Categories: baby, father son, kids, girl, love, mom, son,

The Only Girl

Hey Son, I wrote this to warn you
In your whole life, many girls are coming through 
You might have only girl to love her much over
But you have to remember that do not hurt your mother
She is my only girl too...

Poem Details | by Richard Breese |
Categories: angel, baby, child, child abuse, divorce, giggle, humor,

Nerd Dad

once a child with a rattle

enjoyed crawling around cattle

till its mother found out

and to her ex did shout

you lost your custody battle.

Poem Details | by Jan Allison |
Categories: drink, humorous,

Poetry In Motion

When Asher-Leigh made fudge smoothie It’s not one that you’d want to see It looked like baby pooh That you’d flush down the loo I’m certain it’s no drink for me! A funny Limerick Contest Sponsored by Tania Kitchin 06/03/22

Poem Details | by Jan Allison |
Categories: baby, body, humorous, woman,

Flood Warning

A gravid young lady named Prue Was bursting to go to the loo She crossed her legs tight With all of her might It’s what pregnant ladies go through! 21st June 2016

Poem Details | by Tim Ryerson |
Categories: funny,

Bend Over Baby

Got referred to a female Urologist
After which I needed a Psychologist
"I'm a licensed physician
Now resume your position!"
Next appointment? Her sister Proctologist

Poem Details | by Nyonglema Pisoh |
Categories: baby, family, mom, mother, mother daughter, my child, my children,

New Life

Hiding in mummy's tummy, kicking happily away
 I'm kissing you warmly, clapping and singing in play
 They say in a few weeks
 I'll be able to kiss  your new cheeks
 I can't wait for the morning I'll lift you in a sway

(c) Nyonglema

Poem Details | by Nitesh Aggarwal |
Categories: childhood, death, family, funny, husband, wedding, wife,

Roman Wedlock

A baby, pious, was born by aide
He named it Gaias, and felt like a jade
While he cried,
Cause mommy died.
His wife hired yet another maid.

Poem Details | by Jack Horne |
Categories: childhood

Bye Bye, Baby

As this poem was being written,
A small boy appeared to be smitten.
He loved his baby brother,
But then he asked his mother,
‘Please can we swap him for a kitten?’

Brotherly Love
Jack Horne
24th April 2011

Poem Details | by Larry Belt |
Categories: funnyme, me,

Baby Dill

If I had a shiny new nickel
I'd buy me another dill pickle
My wife thinks she knocked me up
Made me go pee in a cup
But pickle juice came out in a trickle

Poem Details | by Jan Allison |
Categories: baby,

Liar and Hillary - Not For Contest

‘Damn Liar’! said Hillary to Bill You told me ‘that girl’ was on the pill Now she’s got a tum As big as they come You're the daddy, now ain’t that a thrill! 22nd May 2015

Poem Details | by Nitesh Aggarwal |
Categories: childhood, children, funny,

My Baby Dreams.

There once was a dream in my sleep
I was out in the fields with my sheep
I wanted to pee
Let it out with glee
I woke up with in a puddle in my keep.

Poem Details | by Derrick Shane |
Categories: care, cute love, funny love, kiss, love, lust, woman,

Hey Cutie

Your sheer arrogance makes me giggle
Your butt does the cutest wiggle
I really hope you like me
I want to call you baby
Or maybe my little piggle.


Poem Details | by Paul Schneiter |
Categories: baby, humor,


CEO Andrew Sykes took a social crash dive
he asked a clerk when her baby would arrive.
"I'm not pregnant!" she exclaimed
her face was red and inflamed.
'Tis a miracle he fled her presence alive.

Poem Details | by Jack Ellison |
Categories: fun, tribute,

Eve, My Dear Eve

Eve, dear Eve, you are such a sweet lady My heart skips a beat when you write me, oh baby! I tingle and squirm And mess up my perm My thoughts could be considered a wee bit shady! © Jack Ellison 2015

Poem Details | by John Williams |
Categories: children, funny,

Messy Baby

Youngin Greg found an egg
Struck it with his mummy's peg,
Only taking one baby stroke
Out came the gooey yolk
Running down his leg.

Poem Details | by Dane Ann Smith-Johnsen |
Categories: family, husband, social, work

The Woes of a Househusband

The Woes of a Househusband

There once was a rich attorney named Joyce.
She fought for women's lib with a strong voice.
Her husband raised their baby.
And cleaned their house like crazy.
As she approached the bar, he lost his choice.

© August 26, 2010
Dane Smith-Johnsen