Just a text to say i love you
I cant help it there's nothing i can do.
You are my best friend
And my love for you will never end.
I just want to know if you love me too
Always salty and usually bitter
help encourage the spitter —
still better than the wonts
and those dreaded donts —
saved by the tolerable quitter.
Contest: Quitters Never Win
Sponsor: Margarita Lillico
Mei-Ling was known to kiss and tell
Got worse when she wed Me Hung Well
With the power of thought
Set to give what he ought
And spent all night ringing her bell.
- - - - - - - - -
5 November 2018
Inspired by Jan Allison's limerick, "His gift it needed a lift".
Jan's spouse said she's gilding the lilies
For treating herself to new frillies
All the neighbours got hot
When they saw what she bought
And that really gave Jan the willies!
I met a lovely lady and her name was Pretty,
I wanted her badly so I had to be witty,
She now resides in my mind,
Our lives forever entwined,
Now the song in my heart is this here little ditty.
Sure this is familiar, “I am one who loved not wisely but too well”
At times feel like Shakespeare, you make my lower regions swell
“What light through yonder
Window breaks” I ponder
Methinks been into the sauce which is not totally nouvelle
Watched Bette Midler singing “Wind Beneath My Wings”
Brought a tear to my eye, such an emotional tugging on my heartstrings
Like only Bette can do
A love song so touching, so true
Her smile exudes warmth and passion as she sings
Smaltz loved limburger cheese with passion
A fact that turned co-workers’ noses ashen.
The stench made ill all near his breath
Notes on his locker hinted at death.
Smaltz now finds cheddar fragrantly in fashion.
Down to earth and natural natives
Passionate loving determined and quiet
Respected and feared by all
Traits make me vulnerable
Strong willed and dependable always
Golfers ahead were really slow
because their dead balls just wouldn't go
we offered them beer,
later we found cheer--
they stepped aside to let it outflow.
There once was a fellow named Dave
To a pen, he was master and slave
During the day he would lust
A blank sheet did not trust
Yet at the end of the day he would cave
There once was guy named Steve
He swam in a pool with Eve
With a frisky smile
He undressed her with guile
In nine months she was to conceive
There once was a woman named Shar,
Who went to her local State Fair,
Her husband came too,
Can't say no to you,
And they were quickly thrown out of there
Okay I hereby confess to you guys
All my life I've had a craving for fries
Could eat a whole ton
Can't stop at just one
Ladies warned me, they go straight to my thighs
© Jack Ellison 2015
Sex is not the answer..sex is the question
“Yes” is the answer..but it's only a suggestion
The choice is yours
Your illnesses it cures
The one thing that tweaks your tweaker without exception
While watching comedians on TV
Sure wish one of those guys was me
Making people laugh
It would be such a gas
I'd even perform on stage for free
© Jack Ellison 2015
Rick held a winning ticket and a flame
He said, “Dear, I love you more than this claim!”
Just before he set fire
She charged with a live wire
And soon a wealthy widow she became
Scattered beautifully on our bed are roses
But it's the one that I like that poses
For it attracts in me
My mind and body agrees
Lay down whilst this Highlander proposes
Mothers are the best
They are like a test
They are very loving
They like a flower budding
The treat us like a fest.
Little one winks to her big James
Her mind wants the evening games
Ones desire to be astride
For their lips to collide
Passion fueled they danced into flames
Have I told you lately how much fun I'm having
In this sea of heart felt emotions I'm splashing
What would I do
Without all of you
My world would be empty and devoid of all laughing
© Jack Ellison 2015
High and Tight – for contest
His soldier stood up – ramrod stiff
when he caught the first sensuous whiff
piqued his passion to plunder
scented cheese from down under
sweet downstairs aroma of Quiffe.
submitted to – LIMERICK CONTEST
sponsor – Jan Allison
Tonight I thought passion would bring
But not in the shape of a bed spring
The very moment I peaked
I felt what was breached
Now I am so very hampered in upswing
~*~ For Francine's "Wow Me in 5 Lines" contest ~*~
Once, a gold digger I met
With passion, the goldmine all night long she dug
What a way to discover a talent
A grave digger she became.
For, her grave she dug, whilst for gold she dug.
hunger of the flesh , you must protest !!
Oh' this fleshly disaster , what a mess
maybe just one more slice..
to much could bring a demise
deny this flesh , wouldn't want to regress