Limerick Poems About Sex | Sex Limerick Poems
Poem Details | by Jan Allison |
Categories: farm, humorous, sexy,

Mary In the Dairy

A curvaceous lady named Mary Just loved having sex in the dairy When smothered with whipped cream Her beau would lick her clean… His Calorie intake was scary!!! 14th June 2016

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Poem Details | by Jan Allison |
Categories: humorous, pets,

Has Anyone Seen My Pussy - Bawdy Limerick

My Tomcat drives me up the walls On neighbourhood kitties he calls Sired more than one kitten With sex he is smitten He’s gonna be losing his balls! A Funny or Bawdy Limerick Poetry Contest Sponsored by Tania Kitchin 04/30/23

Poem Details | by Jan Allison |
Categories: humorous,

Herbie Rides Again

Two autos both tried to have sex. A pity they both were such wrecks! With great apprehension, One lost its suspension. Old banger sex – oh so complex! 12~21~14 Contest: East Jesus Sponsor: Roy Jerden Checked using how many Syllables 8,8,6,6,8 ~awarded 3rd place~

Poem Details | by Jan Allison |
Categories: humorous,

Old Bill - Bawdy Limerick

A sex mad codger named Bill Swallowed a Viagra pill His todger did rise - You should see the size It sure gave his wife a thrill 17th Feb 2015

Poem Details | by Jan Allison |
Categories: humorous,

Feeling Hot Hot Hot

He wanted it hot with lots of spice 
Not sugary sweet and tasting nice 
Oh big boy you're a looker  
We had sex on the cooker
I’m so pleased I took your advice

Jan Allison
17th September 2014

Poem Details | by Jan Allison |
Categories: giggle, humorous, sexy,

Just a Gigolo

A young gigolo called Timothy Gave sex for an exorbitant fee But his passionate style Sure made all ladies smile… (I’m hoping that he’s got room for me!) 02~13~17

Poem Details | by Rico Leffanta |
Categories: betrayal, culture, love, lust, marriage, miracle, relationship,

Love Versus Lust

Some folk are prone to love affairs
For sex rewards the one who dares
They are hot to trot
Because they forgot
Miracles don't happen in pairs!

Poem Details | by Jan Allison |
Categories: body, humorous, me,

Sex Change

Folks know me as ‘poetry Jan’ But soupers I once was a man … In a very long op My male bits got the chop And I altered my name from Stan! HAPPY APRIL FOOLS DAY SOUPERS!!!! 1st April 2018

Poem Details | by Rico Leffanta |
Categories: humor,

Sex Education For Kids

A day at the zoo can be tough
As animals tend to play rough
So mom said, "Whoa!
Its time to go!"
When bull elephants did some stuff

Poem Details | by Mark Koplin |
Categories: humor,

Woodrow Is Lame

Woodrow's wife is the apple of his eye
But there's been no sex lately and here's why
She told him that he's lame
Every night it's the same
There are other options she wants to try

Poem Details | by Andrea Dietrich |
Categories: funny, giggle,


One day with her pet lizard, on a
warm beach lay the sex goddess Shawna.
One who ogled her bust
tried to claim he was just
enthralled by her lovely iguana!

For john freeman's Giggle 2 Contest

Poem Details | by James Fraser |
Categories: best friend, blessing, funny, graduation, humor, humorous, men,

What a Subject

Two old codgers were talking about sex And ones question popped up next This Viagra have you tried For me I can't decide Mm, that's a hard one,what a subject

Poem Details | by Robert Candler |
Categories: age, appreciation, beauty, body, fantasy, girlfriend, money,

What a Way To Go

An old man bought her gems and he smiled,
Knowing where they would be in a while...
Sex with a young beauty,
Great legs, boobs and booty.
If he died, he'd be going in style.

Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: funny, travel,

The ''Dirty Old Man'' Syndrome Song

When traveling among the throng
His thoughts have too often gone wrong
Alluring effects
Of the opposite sex
Have the devil stomping his prong

Poem Details | by Paul Callus |
Categories: computer, silly,


I fell in love with a computer
Not for the sex, for it is neuter
It came without name
Oh my! What a shame!
I googled one and up came Luther.

Limerick Contest II
Sponsor: Jan Allison
Placed 1st
20th February, 2016

Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: anniversary, appreciation, art, beauty, body, funny, simile,

New Year's Resolution Inspired By John Cameron Swayze

We suggest a v-gina's for sex
And hope the owner expects
To take a licking
And keep on ticking
Over and over like a Timex

Poem Details | by Lindsay Laurie |
Categories: nonsense,

Sex Change

We once knew a fella named Abel,
Who loved to jump razor wire cable,
One day he made a slip;
Heard a howl and a rip...
So now we address him as Mabel.

Poem Details | by Jack Ellison |
Categories: passion,

Sex Is the Question

Sex is not the is the question “Yes” is the answer..but it's only a suggestion The choice is yours Your illnesses it cures The one thing that tweaks your tweaker without exception

Poem Details | by Jan Allison |
Categories: humorous,

Light and Hope Limerick

Jim flicked off the bedroom wall LIGHT With HOPE of a wild sex filled night But the tone of his wife Made him fear for his life Guess she’s keeping her legs shut tight L & H Contest – Sponsor Catie Lindsey 05~21~15

Poem Details | by Barbara Gorelick |
Categories: funny

Avoiding the Irs

There once was a woman  named Roxanne
Who had sex with many a fine man
She charged a big fee
And made them agree
To never disclose the business she ran

For Deb's contest...

Poem Details | by Andrea Dietrich |
Categories: parody

Worst(Worstest?) Limrick Evah

Heres a rilly lame limrick for ya-
Write hear I'll change the beet!
also I ain't bin usin end rime
An this old line is whey to long for a forth line.
Kin ya gess how many words was spellt rong?
hummm, is that fiv or sex lines I needs?

For P.D.'s "My Worst Poem Ever" Contest

Poem Details | by Paul Schneiter |
Categories: humor,

Sex Change

There was a gigolo who swallowed a bee
It pained him from stomach to knee.
But with a shout and curse
He saw things get worse.
It buzzed him from a he to a she.

Poem Details | by Jan Allison |
Categories: humorous, nature, woman,

The Naked Truth -Bawdy Limerick

There once was a woman called Callie Who loved having sex in the valley Out in the fresh air Her flesh she would bare ‘Twas better than in the back alley 03~30~17

Poem Details | by Jan Allison |
Categories: humorous, sexy,

She Loves It Outdoors

A flighty young lady from Torbay Got seen having sex in a doorway She blushed bright scarlet red Said I like it in bed But this is just part of our foreplay! 12th April 2016

Poem Details | by Jack Ellison |
Categories: fun,

Is Rough Sex Dirty

Woody Allen once pondered, “Is rough sex dirty?” Replied “Only if it's done right”, his eyes quite blurry Voice trembling and shaking During this joyous undertaking Apologized for his words which came out quite slurry

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