Written by
Jesse Rowe
Categories:
bird, food, funny,
Fatso
They said how she ate was absurd;
A "Fatso", they called her she heard,
And ever since then
That poor, baby wren
Just pecked at her food like a bird.
8.31.18
Contest: Any Animal or Creature Limerick
Written by
Paul Callus
Categories:
food,
Mac and Mac
To the diner Mac went for a meal
Where he ordered two helpings of veal.
All he had was one dime
Could not pay! What a crime!
Washing-up was the fairest MacDeal
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Limerick Contest
Sponsor: Cecelia Hopkins-Drewer
Placed 4th
© 2nd June 2017
Written by
Duke Beaufort
Categories:
anger, drug, food, hate, integrity, mental illness,
An interesting party we have going here
The comments we like for dessert
Are iambs that writers here blurt
But eating foul crunch
That slaughtered lambs munch
Tastes toxic like trumped-up bad dirt
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
celebration, food, thanksgiving, thanksgiving day,
Turkey's Dont Enjoy Thanksgiving
Today it is Thanksgiving Day
For all dead turkey’s I do pray
That you had a good life
Now you’re carved with a knife
Served on a plate as the entrée
Have a great Thanksgiving folks!
26th November 2015
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
food, humorous,
Diet Dilemma
I’m trying a new ‘see food’ diet
I’d recommend that you all try it
Any food will do
Nothing’s bad for you..
It's no wonder my trousers don’t fit!
Written 18th February
Posted on 23rd February
Written by
Paul Callus
Categories:
food,
Pies
He phoned the village bakery
And ordered a delivery
Loads and loads of tasty pies
Ate them all but at a price
He spent the night in misery.
------------------------------------
Contest: Plentitude of Pies
Sponsor: Sheri Fresonke Harper
Written by
Hannah Everett
Categories:
art, dog, food, sister,
Not a Noodle, a Poodle
My sister likes to doodle
I thought she drew a noodle
She gave me a glare
And tugged at my hair
And told me t'was a poodle.
Written by
Cheryl Hoffman
Categories:
childhood, food, humor,
My Childhood Cereal
Waking up for school was hard enough,
still half asleep not ready for the bus,
breakfast on the dot,
snap, crackle and pop,
noisy Rice Krispy's helping us wake up.
12-5-16
Written by
John Smith
Categories:
food,
Neapolitan
Block of Neapolitan Ice Cream;
to my diet, a scream in a dream
Chocolate, strawberry
and vanilla; very
delicious Then I bust out a seam.
Written by
John Watt
Categories:
boy, food, mother, mother son, teenage,
O Teenage Metabolism, Where Art Thou
When I was a teen, I would munch
My way through the whole Sunday brunch.
I'd destroy that buffet,
Then as we walked away,
I would ask my poor mother, "When's lunch?"
Written by
Cheryl Hoffman
Categories:
food, technology, time,
Fast Food Kitchen
When at home its often fast food I crave,
might even be leftovers that I saved,
always in a race,
open and shut case,
thank God for my nuke everything microwave!
12-20-16
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
food, humorous, insect,
Buzz Off - Bawdy Limerick
At picnics Sue's legs are akimbo
No panties, but Sue ain't no bimbo
It keeps pesky flies
Landing on our pies
Our days out are never in limbo!
Your best New Limerick Contest
Sponsored by Tania Kitchin
02/03/20
Written by
Pat Adams
Categories:
baseball, food, humor, imagery, word play,
Hotdogs On the Run
With Baseball hotdogs on the run
Caught up in, excitement and fun
Watch where you go
Before you know
You might slip and fall on your bun!
Written by
Gershon Wolf
Categories:
farm, food,
Farmer Mcgillicuddy
Poor old Farmer McGillicuddy
He’s somewhat of a fuddy-duddy
He plows with an ox
All progress he blocks
No wonder his corn tastes so cruddy
Written by
Michael Wise
Categories:
family, food, horse, humorous,
My Sweet Aunt Mabel
There is my sweet Aunt Mabel
sitting across the table
ever since her divorce
she eats like a horse
so we put her up in a stable
Written by
Rico Leffanta
Categories:
food,
One More 2020 Tragedy
Jan's cucumber* got quite a spin
From a lady who did not like men
It worked like a charm
And caused her no harm
But got dumped in the rubbish bin
*queuing_for_his_cucumbers_-_bawdy_1277298
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
food, humorous,
Queuing For His Cucumbers - Bawdy
Bill’s cucumbers grew long and hard
Nuns queued up for them in his yard
‘Twas their weekly treat…
They were not to eat
I’ll finish here… or I’ll get barred!
08/12/20
Written by
Wren Rushing
Categories:
animal, food, humor,
Shark In the Soup
In my soup I could have sworn I saw a shark.
Swimming in roux that was rather dark.
But to my relief,
the fin a bay leaf.
Now I wear glasses before each meal I start.
12/27/18
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
age, clothes, food, memory,
Going Dotty
My elderly auntie named Dot
her memory’s going to pot
For she served me raw food
and was totally nude
A dinner I’ve never forgot
7/27/18
Written by
James Horn
Categories:
allegory, analogy,
Food To Feed Separate From Weed
Food To Feed Separate from Weed
Morning Has Broken and so has each seed;
Become food to feed separate from weed,
They found,
On ground,
Which was required that they surely need.
My main goal is to motivate others
to write poetry..
Jim Horn
Written by
Rico Leffanta
Categories:
food,
August Departure
I could not see anything wrong
With getting a tan in a thong
But it made Jan ruffle
when it failed to muffle
Spicy chili con carne pong
Written by
Linda Alice Fowler
Categories:
dream, food, fun, funny, humorous, silly, sweet,
Banana Split
Split my banana and stuff it with cream
top with tantalizing treats to extreme
nuts and silky sweetened balls
gooey toppings form seawalls
nothing left out of a lover's wet dream
Written by
Paula Goldsmith
Categories:
animal, food, fun, giggle, sick, uplifting, world,
Holiday Humor
in a flash Santa took off
he has a case of whooping cough
the reindeer are wired
now hungry and tired
they say it is time for beef stroganoff
Written by
Duke Beaufort
Categories:
food,
dough's dire existence
It's not a dessert-worthy treat
But something disgusting to eat
If not rightly mixed
Pin-rolled and affixed
Your pie crust will taste like concrete
Written by
Gershon Wolf
Categories:
animal, food, funny, giggle,
A Delicacy to Delight the Most Discriminating Pig
Porky Pig once stopped by my butcher shoppe
Pig was not looking for any old slop
He searched high and low
Meat tasted like crow
'Please, Elmer, one pound of strings from your mop’