Pets Limerick Poems - Limerick Poems and Poets

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Written by Jan Allison
Categories: humorous, pets,

Has Anyone Seen My Pussy - Bawdy Limerick

My Tomcat drives me up the walls
On neighbourhood kitties he calls
Sired more than one kitten
With sex he is smitten
He’s gonna be losing his balls!

A Funny or Bawdy Limerick Poetry Contest
Sponsored by Tania Kitchin
04/30/23

Written by William Robinson
Categories: animals, funny, people, pets,

Old Melon

There once was a hunter named Frawley
Who lived in a shack, outside Raleigh.
His dog, funny but true,
Would only hunt honeydew.
The dog was a true melon collie.

Written by Anil Deo
Categories: allusion, animal, humor, pets,

Adding Clarity To Ray Gridley's Limerick

Ray Gridley has a possible diagnosis
Alas, rabbits do catch viral myxomatosis
Since Jan's is a famous banging bunny
Who stays far from field and ANY honey
Energizer Bunny will bang on till unconscious!

(c)Deo, 04152017

Written by Richard Breese
Categories: anti bullying, bullying, giggle, humor, humorous, pets

a dog named harry

a hairy thing roamed our streets

chasing cats for sport and treats

till it roamed too far

and dog catcher car

grabbed harry and chained his feets.

Written by Lawrence Ingle
Categories: funny, natural disasters, pets

Monkey Poo

Monkey see....monkey do...
Monkey took a poo poo...
Monkey pooed on my arm..
on my shirt...icky warm...
Monkey poo rings my alarm!
Monkey monkey...look at you!
Get this off...it's from your wah-zoo!!
Eep! eep! eep! said the monkey!
Then he squeezed his nose...
'cause it smelled funky!

Written by Lynn Dolly
Categories: food, funny, imagination, pets,

Garage Sale

1221 Boiling Weather Drive
First customer gets a free beehive
With purchase ten bones or more
Food, drinks, desserts galore
Porcelain hitchhiker needs a ride

Written by Richard Pickett
Categories: pets, sports,

Rah,Rah Jackson

There is a Pug dog named Jackson
and college football is his game,
with no time to spare
he's up in his chair,
to watch his favorite team Notre Dame

Written by Milton Toran
Categories: humor, humorous, pets,

Broom Warfare

These walls conceal an ugly war
Kitty litter raids my floor
This tidy home I'm sworn to keep
A rugged broom's a tiresome sweep
Three cats are such a chore

Written by Rhonda Johnson-Saunders
Categories: dedication, family, pets, sweet, sweet,

My Old Dog, Sweet Pea

I have an old dog named Sweet Pea
More wily than sweet, you’d agree
Who runs the house?
Not me or my spouse 
No, our dog, Sweet Pea, the queen bee 



* For our little girl, Sweet Pea, after 15 years with us, she is a part of the family.

Written by Gerard Keogh Jr.
Categories: animals, fantasy, pets, satire

The Doggone Dog Contest.

Rufus: Irish Rover Purebred and a Fortune 500 Pup ( As told by Rufus himself.)

Watch me snarl all the salesmen away,
ram the door, keep the mailmen at bay.
Each evening, I break
for a fresh T-bone steak.
The sun shines on my ass the WHOLE day.

Written by Chaim Wilson
Categories: internet, life, people, pets,

Computer Shell Game

Digital life discourages thinking,
Laptops encourage time sinking,
Really surfing-the-net,
Is indulging a pet,
For PC’s are pet squirrels chewing nuts who are linking.

Written by Matthew Anish
Categories: humorous,

Another Limerick

There was a young man from China
Who couldn't think of anything finer
Than to smoke cigarettes - play with his pets 
Eat out at an all night diner

Written by Jan Allison
Categories: animal, humorous, pets, , cute,

Someone Was Telling Huge Porkie Pies

Peter purchased a cute 'micro pig'
Over time it grew ever so big!
It cannot be denied
That the seller had lied
If he’s caught he’ll end up in the brig!

01~02~16

Written by Michael Hornschuch
Categories: pets

Socks:Revised

Left sock, Right sock where have you gone,
little skooter kitty, up before the dawn,

Now my day has started, 
my socks have all but parted, 

little skooter took em'
to make his bed upon.

Inspired by:
"Keys Please?" by Francine Roberts

Written by Kathy Littrell
Categories: animals, funny, pets, cat,

Friendship Ended

A young robin my cat once befriended
          Till one day the relationship ended
                  I came home to find
                  That my cat changed her mind
           For from her mouth a feather extended

Written by Jack Ellison
Categories: pets,

Annie Our Golden

Annie, our Golden, is a member of the family
Just like a daughter, it's really uncanny
After going out upon our return
Our love's enthusiastically reaffirmed
Her excitement explodes, our dearest sweet Annie


© Jack Ellison 2015

Written by Sara Kendrick
Categories: pets,

Old Dog

There once was a very old, old dog
Who'd lay by the fire of cracklin' logs
Dreaming mighty dreams
Of years gone by schemes
As his legs moved chasing wild mean hogs

Written by Tom Wright
Categories: animal, pets,

Billy

 
Billy
Written: by Tom Wright
2/9/2016

I once had a Billy Goat, past tense,
That feeding made very little sense.
So I sold him of course,
And had little remorse,
For I couldn’t keep him in the fence

Written by D Bronowski
Categories: pets, philosophy,

God Or Dog

I don’t understand the world, or what it is giving
Should I open my eyes and be there and then living?
I asked my dog and as memory recalls
He kept gently but thoroughly licking his balls

Written by David Sollis
Categories: animal, dog, funny, humorous, pets,

Trying To Teach a Dog Tricks

A fellow got into a
fix
Trying to teach his
dog some new tricks
His canine named
Rover
Refused to roll over
And seemed totally
blind to thrown
sticks

Written by Ralph Protsik
Categories: animal, dog, humor, pets,

The Jack Russell Terrier

A packet of fizz the Jack Russell 
Full of dashing and daring and bustle
With engine on race
And the world left to chase
Any wonder he makes such a fussle?

Written by Sara Kendrick
Categories: animals, childhood, funny, pets

The Dog With Clean Teeth

There once was a dog by name of Tiger
She belonged to Kendricks who acquired her
Doris brushed her teeth each week
With Jr.'s  tooth brush so meek
When he learned, said, "Why?"..(She)I did not want mine dirtied sir..

In honor of Brian Strand....

Written by Terry Hoffman
Categories: dog, funny, humor, pets, summer,

Blessed Relief

There once was a boxer named Joe;
the heat made him whimper with woe.
His paw with one stroke
the ice bag he broke,
then Joe had his puddle of snow.