Limerick Poems
Poem Details | by Lycia Harding |
Categories: animal, boat, care, god, good night,

Noah's Ark

Noah loaded great beasts on an ark
and cleaned messes from morning til dark

But a man's gotta eat,
so he feasted on meat

an at least he had less to dis-bark!

Poem Details | by Carolyn Marie Baatz |
Categories: political,

Lucifer

Trump is the devil in disguise
His followers believe his lies
I beg every woman and man
Keep us out of the frying pan
Before we become sizzling fries


Poem Details | by I Am Anaya |
Categories: celebration, silly,

A Real Irish Cat

In County Cork prowls a cat, David Kavanagh Bellies up to the bar with Gilbey's glass in paw Drown the shamrock, sound the alarms Lassies abound, his lucky charms Blaring cheery shout outs of Erin Go Bragh!

Poem Details | by Gershon Wolf |
Categories: drug, friend, silly,

A New Friend from Botswana

  I just made a new friend from Botswana
  Who invites me to smoke marijuana
    I don’t speak his language
    So I’m in real anguish 
  ‘Til he tells me, “You’ll attain nirvana”

Poem Details | by Jack Ellison |
Categories: feelings,

A Favour Is A Favour


When doing a favour, it needn't be returned A favour is a favour, a show of friendship confirmed No need to be repaid So this gesture evade It's sure not necessary where friendships are concerned


Poem Details | by Karen Jones |
Categories: america, integrity, poetry,

Her P is Not Free

There once was a girl from Charlotte 
Rumors spread that she is a harlot
She was loose in her ways
And perhaps her suitors did pay
Would it be better if free tomorrow Scarlet

Poem Details | by Karen Jones |
Categories: poetry,

Limerick

Look in the mirror what do you see
Image of a fool staring at me
Maroon moon marching in mind
Emerald eyes that use to be mine
Rosy smile the limerick inspires
Igloo indigo heart set on fire
Can only wish for such a thrill
Kinda like a limerick with a chill

Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: environment, humor, integrity, judgement, money, water,

avoiding a drain nightmare

About toilet paper guests swipe
The staff at hotels have a gripe
They say steal it not
And buy one-ply Scott
Which won’t clot your home’s sewage pipe

Poem Details | by Linda Alice Fowler |
Categories: cat, fish, food, fun, humorous, silly,

Clancy and His Fish

There once was a Cat who made a wish.
It had to do with Clancy's pet fish.
	If its bowl would break,
	one swoop would it take
to proclaim Clancy's fish quite delish!

Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: cute, march, math,

pie is not exactly right

While circular area's moot 
3/14 math groupies salute
Approximate pi 
Which helps us get by
Since squares within rounds don't compute

Poem Details | by Sara Etgen-Baker |
Categories: humorous,

In the Village of Blarney

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ In Blarney there’s one magic stone. When you kiss it, you’re put in ‘the zone.’ You’ll soon gab with words so glib. Matters not if truth or fib. With a stout Guinness, one must atone.

Poem Details | by James Study |
Categories: humorous, people, song,

Posey And Shirley

Posey and Shirley two bad men I once knew
Bar room brawlers and stinkers these two
might had made a millionaire
had I told about this pair
Because this was way before boy named Sue

Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: conflict, death, desire, pets,

the charm of the unwelcome

The squirrels' desire emphatic
To airbnb in the attic
Means a landlord may leave
Hors d'ouevres in the eave
That make their guests aromatic

Poem Details | by Bill Baker |
Categories: adventure, boy, crush, girl, humor, mystery, romance,

Hostage

He showed up dressed in black leather
Dates aren’t meant to last forever
     It wasn’t just fun  
     He was on the run
A hostage date was --quite clever

Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: god, hockey, humor, sports,

march 17 hockey holy trinity

They're pagans on ice with wood sticks
And maximum pain each inflicts
But Saint Patrick knows
God prefers trios
Like three-leaf shamrocks and hat tricks

Poem Details | by Jeanette Swan |
Categories: animal, nonsense,

Polly-wally-doodle-doo

There once was a chicken called ‘Polly’,
whose name sounded happy and jolly,
‘til one morning at two,
she crowed, “****-a-doo,”
now our chook is a rooster called Wally.

Poem Details | by Bill Baker |
Categories: animal, dog, funny, humor, imagination, pets, weather,

Hog in the Fog

I saw a man walking his hog
It turned out it was just his dog
     It sure did look real
     But here is the deal
Hard to tell in such a thick fog

Poem Details | by Christopher Delegans |
Categories: fun,

Sly Cat

You sly cat

In the mirror you sat

You’re a mimic feline

A copycat with fur so fine

Eyes gleaming with tales of a mischievous spat

Poem Details | by David Fisher |
Categories: animal, fun,

A Row Of Ducks

An ignorant duck breeder with a moat
Put off repairing his dingy to float
And he doesn’t yet know
Getting his ducks in a row
Means more than getting his ducks in a row-boat

Poem Details | by Terry Flood |
Categories: anger, bird, humorous,

Love Bird

There’s a dove of pure love; could I spot it? For if love is a bug then I’ve got it I looked up above And saw that white dove But it pooped on my head so I shot it

Poem Details | by Daisy Ward |
Categories: humor,

ONE TOOTH TILLY

One tooth Tilly was his name
Women wished that he’d been tame
He wore a light pink suit
With his high-top boot
His daily life was spitting game

Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: angst, change, march, time,

daylight's dilemma

Time is on my side says Mick Jagger
Yes it is and thus he can swagger
But here with disgust
We must clocks adjust
And in morning out of bed stagger

Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: beautiful, funny, giving, nice, trust,

good tailoring isn't swift

Certain yarns with needles knit
Are not strong and likely will split
So please keep in mind
The seamstress is kind
And insists on try-ons for fit

Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: art, devotion, feelings, humor, men, moving on,

sign of the times

When the enterprise gets exposed
A brothel finds out it's opposed
The sign in the front
Men meet with a grunt
Says beat it we recently closed

Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: fashion, humor, perspective,

what botox can't fix

A boob who was rather naggy
Said to its mate we're too saggy
Without more support
I'm afraid dear cohort
We're nuts in pants that look baggy

Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: humor, love, rain, sexy,

hot and wanting it

She said I'm all wet with a yell
If doing it now we could tell
She'd be satisfied
With what was implied
But I had no umbrella to sell

Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: earth, humor,

an amazing find

They found old tampons that were damp
So archeologists at camp
Questioned if terra
Has a named era
For the period of this cramp

Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: humor, life,

Lingerie Labyrinth

You might trip if caught in a flap
Or with your foot stuck in a strap
When flooring's criss-crossed
With bras she has tossed
You will need a booby-trap map

Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: humor,

garden dress rehearsal

Their blushing cannot be suppressed
Green tomatoes have this protest:
Lettuce fresh out of bed
Turns us shades of red
When we watch that salad get dressed

Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: humor, introspection, irony, political,

brewskis before ballots

There once were some voters from here
With factual knowledge unclear
Once in voting booths
Without simple truths
Picked with whom they'd rather drink beer

Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: america, introspection, political,

cycle of folly

Repeat of the four-year refrain
Pits demented versus insane
We who are pundits
Say please call it quits
And would toast their obits with champagne

Poem Details | by James Study |
Categories: death, forgiveness, life,

Faith

I know a hole in the ground is not the end
I pray dear Lord forgive me of my sin
The end of the fence I can see
Heaven is where I want to be
So many people I want to see again

Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: dream, memory, mental health, sleep, symbolism,

neurons at night

Brains beam back connections as dreams
While sorting much data in streams
But these mind fables
Come with graphic labels
Like symbols in Microsoft Teams

Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: career, seasons, travel, work,

freedom's vibrant canvas

Where job creativity's hated
We will weep and feel castrated
But after quitting
It's real and so fitting
Without bawls anymore we're elated

Poem Details | by Aniruddha Pathak |
Categories: health,

Mind is monkey, health a beast

To west lie when things I can't resist, 
Ye persuade me to look to the east,
Then haply let me feast
On what I should the least,
O mind thou art monkey, and health a beast. 
______________________________________ 
Tongue-in-cheek | 01.02.2011 | limerick