GDPR Cookie Consent by FreePrivacyPolicy
Limerick Poems
Poem Details | by Justin Abdool |
Categories: funny, humor, sick,

The Nasty Boy

There once was a boy named Spinner
Whose finger was always inner

He picked his nose all day
Then put boogers away

And feasted on them for dinner!


Poem Details | by L MILTON HANKINS |
Categories: basketball, sports,

Local Draft Choice

Once lived an energetic lad in Montreal He was rather large, I would say, seven feet tall Tough as old shoe leather He did not care whether He played with varsity team basketball, at all.
written July 23, 2021

Poem Details | by Rico Leffanta |
Categories: baseball,

Base Ball

The Stats show a Brooklyn Dodger
Scored RBIs with his todger
Then one day at bat
A Foul Ball went splat
And now he's Soprano Codger 


RBI=Runs Batted In

Poem Details | by Daisy Ward |
Categories: humor,

AUGUST HEAT

August’s coming to bring extreme heat
It even burns the bottom of my feet
Need ice packs just to cool down
I start taking it around
To show that the heat has reached its peak


Poem Details | by Unseeking Seeker |
Categories: love,

Let go off, to get to

this jigsaw puzzle has missing parts optimal then, to add heart to cart love aligned, stance erect blissful, with no defect get rid thee now, of ego upstart 23-July-2021

Poem Details | by Gershon Wolf |
Categories: giggle, sports, success,

Long Jonn Silver Goes for the Gold

Long John Silver, a hurdler, goes for the gold
Tall and long-legged, he sure fits the mold
   Long John clears every bar
   It's his moment to star --
'Til his 'other long leg' sticks out too far

Poem Details | by Kim Merryman |
Categories: america, corruption,

Going to Pot

America is going to pot,
Whether we like it or not.
Our debt is too high,
The economy is dry,
And the government is full of rot.

7/22/21

Poem Details | by Rico Leffanta |
Categories: men,

Horrorscope

Leo the Lion's back in town
All the lads are wearing a frown
They want to look tough
But he plays too rough
When they can't keep their pecker down

Poem Details | by Shirley Hawkins |
Categories: 10th grade,

Spoiled Sport

Sheila loved all sport,
Even though she was extremely short.
She always had lots of fun.
Although Sheila never won.
She was doing what she thought she ought.


Poem Details | by Shirley Hawkins |
Categories: 10th grade,

Fancy That

Ruby was round and fat,
She was always careful where she sat.
When she travelled on a bus
Her size caused quite a fuss
Because she squashed other people flat.

Poem Details | by Gershon Wolf |
Categories: america, giggle, leadership, satire,

The Age of Outrage

Joseph Biden thought he'd call Donald Trump
Trump picked up and roared, "How ya do-in,' Chump?" --
   President Joe was outraged
   He had Stormy Daniels paged --
Smirked, "This'll help you get over the hump."



Poem Details | by Shirley Hawkins |
Categories: 10th grade,

Ruddy Shame

He had thick red hair and a beard
Now his hair has disappeared
It concerns him that's a fact.
Keeping all his parts intact
Why has he become so weird?

Poem Details | by L MILTON HANKINS |
Categories: humorous,

Two Boys Went Fishing - BAWDY

Two boys were fishing when they met a willing broad The first boy quickly extended his fishing rod And so, when he was done She saw the other one Who had already caught his allotment of cod.
written July 21, 2021

Poem Details | by Rico Leffanta |
Categories: relationship,

Tutu Ring

The wife loves the neighbourhood lads
And shares with them the latest fads
She shows them how
To milk a cow
So they all know how to be dads

Poem Details | by Jack Ellison |
Categories: psychological,

Atoms



If we can't see atoms, are we sure they exist All the experts say yes, in fact they insist These invisible devils Confuse our brain pebbles Will I kill a bunch if I smash down my fist?

Poem Details | by Gershon Wolf |
Categories: animal, food, sports,

Mister Lucky

A professional wrestler of gators
Tried his luck as a restaurant waiter
   He'd feint and he'd juke
   Many patrons puked
Seafood business surprisingly cratered

Poem Details | by L MILTON HANKINS |
Categories: humorous,

My Sister the Virgin Mary

My sister Mary was contrary
She met a nice fellow named Harry
He tried, without a doubt
But she would not put out
Virgin Mary will never marry.

written July 20, 2021

Poem Details | by Caren Krutsinger |
Categories: 7th grade, 8th grade, 9th grade, animal,

Donkey Mule Sidekick and ***

A donkey, mule, sidekick and ***
Are they the same or does one have more class?
I wish I knew
It makes me blue
Whatever the answer, please let them pass.



Poem Details | by Rico Leffanta |
Categories: sports,

Oh Limp Pix

A photographer of Indoor Sports
Found himself dragged through the lower courts
The hotel said
He filmed their bed
When a buxom housemaid dropped her shorts

Poem Details | by Anthony Biaanco |
Categories: america, baseball, beautiful, betrayal,

Big RED BALLS and small tanks

Number forty six barely knows his name
hunter loves his hoo-Xi and fine oil paints
while the free world's going soft
the commies flash big red balls
freedom will die if democracy tanks

Poem Details | by Gershon Wolf |
Categories: business, money, school,

Mort's Rolling in the Dough

Mortimer found school to be a great big bore
Finished twelfth grade, couldn't take any more
   Didn't want 'nine-to-five'
   How would he ever thrive
Mort's smart ~ Opened up a cannabis store

Poem Details | by Rico Leffanta |
Categories: perspective,

Straight Flush

Limericks I posted on Soup
"Stunk like an old chicken coop"
Critics asked for more
I wondered what for
But now you have the latest poop . . . . .

Poem Details | by L MILTON HANKINS |
Categories: humorous, jobs, loss,

Unfortunate Circumstances

A certain young fellow in Frisco
Went dancing one night at a disco
Tipsy, I am told,
When he lost billfold
Now he's lost his job with Nabisco.

written July 18, 2021

Poem Details | by L MILTON HANKINS |
Categories: humorous, money,

Worth More Than a Nickel

There once was a rich man from Des Moines Whose profile was engraved on a coin He was so proud He crowed out loud It was money that kept him going.
Written July 18, 2021

Poem Details | by Rico Leffanta |
Categories: word play,

Gust of Eyeful

Our vicar was describing Hell
When it suddenly rung a bell
I dreamed that in Paris
I climbed up a Ferris
Then on to the Tower I fell .....

Poem Details | by Caren Krutsinger |
Categories: nature,

Nature Limerick

bushy tailed squirrel runs around oak
wet violet dew gives them plenty of soak
grass is so green
snake barely seen
little mouse is about ready to croak



Poem Details | by Jack Ellison |
Categories: music,

An Old Crow



Sinatra, Crosby, Bennett and Como Crooners from the past a long time ago Today's hullabaloo Don't know who's who Guess I'm just an old over-the-hill crow

Poem Details | by Rico Leffanta |
Categories: wind,

Toyful Teufel

The Devil delights in foul play
So when a man kneels down to pray
Its no bloody wonder
It sounds just like thunder
When all those P U's blow your way!

Poem Details | by Richard Breese |
Categories: appreciation, community, environment, funny, giggle, humor, rain,

Unlikely Hero

My neighborhood has not seen rain
Since I fell through our windowpane.
And though neighbors don't go out
Due to the unseemly drought,
I am hero of the floodplain.

Poem Details | by James Edward Lee Sr. |
Categories: adventure, analogy, irony,

JOHNNIE RUNNER-

Once so a man who likes running; He's barefoot is fast and so cunning; Was urgent sure not so quiet mountainair; He couldn't say no to a marathon; Runs Johnnie run
7/16/21 Written words by James Edward Lee Sr 2021

Poem Details | by Justin Abdool |
Categories: evil, irony,

The Man and The Vampire

There once was a man named Mire
Who owed blood to a vampire

So he stayed by light
Until it was night

And was burned by his own fire!

Poem Details | by L MILTON HANKINS |
Categories: humorous,

The Better Punishment

There once was a troublesome brother Who was mean to his dear old mother She paddled him hard Out in the back yard Better a paddling than the druther.
written July 16, 2021

Poem Details | by Rico Leffanta |
Categories: word play,

Deep Russian

A woman feels alive and kicking
Whenever she gets a good licking
Insert a tool
Just like a mule
And who cares if the clock is ticking?

Poem Details | by Anthony Biaanco |
Categories: anxiety, red,

Dr Seuss and the little yellow stars

Xi released a mad bug from his red cave
and fated millions to premature graves
while we burned DR, Seuss books
Mario and Xi wiggled off the hook
Joe n Hunter have yuan in their banks
 



Yuan is the currency of communist China





Poem Details | by L MILTON HANKINS |
Categories: humorous,

Secondary Position

A fat older man from New Delhi Had much trouble seeing his willie He tried to lose enough weight Alas, it was not his fate So he posed for Buddha on telly.
written July 15, 2021


All Limericks