Written by
Maureen McGreavy The Insolent Rib
Categories:
business, crazy, drug, health,
Dumpster Fire Pharma
Sanity meted in batches
With healthcare served up in patches
It’s a dumpster dive
Just staying alive
To rely on raccoons playing with matches
Written by
Duke Beaufort
Categories:
anger, drug, food, hate, integrity, mental illness,
An interesting party we have going here
The comments we like for dessert
Are iambs that writers here blurt
But eating foul crunch
That slaughtered lambs munch
Tastes toxic like trumped-up bad dirt
Written by
Gershon Wolf
Categories:
drug, flower, love,
Poppy Love
A cocaine abuser named Norton
A fellow drug addict was courtin'
It was love at first sight
He'd found MrsRight
So he plucked her a poppy for snortin'
Written by
Duke Beaufort
Categories:
drug,
CVS--how not to treat a customer
Their 1:30 lunch—that is fine
But I’m there at 1:29
They said you're too late
With glee closed the gate
So I filed a protest online
Written by
Duke Beaufort
Categories:
anger, care, celebration, drug, humor, relationship,
I love and kiss the CVS people
I’ll get to the pills with a twist
The scripts filled by my pharmacist
If there’s a hiccup
Delaying the pick-up
Watch out as I might just get pissed
Written by
John Lawless
Categories:
humor, men, drug,
Surf's Up - For Contest
SURF'S UP
It drug the beach sand making trenches
causing lightheaded fainting of wenches
the ocean was icy
he stood out quite nicely
even after allowing for shrinkage.
2/19/2016
submitted to – Limerick Contest II – for fun – Poetry Contest
sponsor – Jan Allison
Written by
Thane Kerric
Categories:
abuse, addiction, loss, today, drug,
What Has Happened To Our Shows
Alcohol, drugs, and lies
some of them die
slaves to the stage
fans filled with rage
our favorites just say goodbye
Written by
Jack Ellison
Categories:
humorous, drug, daffodils,
Bills Bills Head Busting Bills
Bills, bills, head busting bills
Checked the drug store, ain't no bill pills
Got pills for aches
Got pills for weight
Think I'll just go out and pick daffodils
© Jack Ellison 2015
(A sequel LOL)
Written by
Mark Goodson
Categories:
fantasy, funny, happiness, life, love, drug,
Viagra
I once had a wife named Cleopatra
Who expected me to perform some abracadabra
My body is old
But I became bold
So I went off to the drug store for some viagra
Written by
Jack Ellison
Categories:
humor, love, drug,
J-A-C-K-L-E-S
Does anyone know how to spell the word love
L-O-V-E you answered, all you adorable love bugs
But that's incorrect
It's J-A-C-K-L-E-S, by heck
It's the name of this most powerful new drug
© Jack Ellison 2015
Written by
Paul Schneiter
Categories:
insect, drug,
Bugged
In his fancy hotel room James found bed bugs
at first he thought he was on too many drugs.
But they were real, moving about
he wanted to leave, get right out.
But a maid came and swept 'em under the rugs.
Written by
Poet. Undertaker
Categories:
humor, drug,
Singing Fool
Once there was a man called Jacob Pool.
Nightingale singing in the distance is Pool.
Sing all babes to sleep by night.
Drug to all depressed hearts.might!
bloody what a great sense from this fool!
Written by
Gershon Wolf
Categories:
addiction, drink, drug,
Mary Jane
There once was a lovable loser
A smoker and hard-drinking boozer
Devil said, Try Mary Jane
She'll surely ease all your pain
Loser vowed ~ never to abuse her
Written by
Dean Wood
Categories:
humorous,
Put Your Schooling To Work
Two friends an MBA acquired
In Colorado were inspired
A drug store for Joe
A pot farm for Moe
A joint venture they conspired
August 22, 2017
Written by
Rajat Kanti Chakrabarty
Categories:
fun, nonsense, drug,
Bogg the Steely Bug
Bogg the steely bug took a smart drug
Played silly buggers in Biggie’s rug
Biggie screeched like owl
Hey,No fare, no fowl
Big Bogg made Biggie a real humbug
Written by
James Fraser
Categories:
imagination, life
Whilst Dead Sunflowers Floated
I woke in a sweat, was it a dream
A heron and a girl near a stream
Whilst dead sunflowers floated
My mind drug induced coated
Have my thoughts reached their extreme
Written by
Daniel Beus
Categories:
baby, best friend, drug, grandfather,
Golly - a Limerick
After we each consumed a weed lolly
My best bestie gave grandad some molly,
He threw her leg over
They rolled in the clover,
Now my auntie’s my bestie’s f*** folly.
Written May 19, 2023 for the "Funny, Bawdy or Humorous Limerick Poetry Contest"
Written by
Duke Beaufort
Categories:
addiction, drug,
Life With T-Rump Xxx
Trump's followers act like androids
Hate fills them with his opioids
This does us chagrin
We must quickly bring in
A flotilla of Sigmund Freuds
Written by
Jack Ellison
Categories:
drug,
Boogers
Limericks by definition are supposed to be funny
They can also be serious when your nose is runny
Annoying as hell
All over your lapel
Hard to be serious, boogers are quite unbecoming
Written by
Jack Ellison
Categories:
courage, drug,
No Talky Before Coffee
No talky before coffee, it's the rule of the house
A well known fact, your day will go south
Hand signs may linger
But no middle finger
And no naughties allowed to come outta your mouth
Written by
Rajat Kanti Chakrabarty
Categories:
fun,
Carrie Meeker
Carrie Meeker was a sleepwalker,
Her doctor prescribed beta blocker;
The drug acted full whack
stopping her sleep and walk
Now she is a real chronic squawker.
Written by
Mahtab Bangalee
Categories:
life, sick,
Controlling Own Mind- Antivirus Drug
Not easy to attack my body
No fear of the covid still in me
Mask and sanitizer
Sleeper cell of killer
In the lungs I install kaspersky
09.07.2020 Chattogram
Written by
Wayne Wysocki
Categories:
drug, humor, humorous,
A Trip To the Orient
by Wayne Wysocki
A poppy is pretty and bright
And its juice is so far out of sight
That the smoke in a den
Full of dirty old men
Makes all of them high as a kite.
Written by
David Drowley
Categories:
drug, humorous, word play,
Stoned
There once was a fellow named Lurch
Who attended a Cannabis church.
Lurch listened not to preaching;
For ignoring church teaching
He got stoned in a grove of birch.
Written by
Linda Alice Fowler
Categories:
drug, food, giggle, happy, humor, money, silly,
Heady Quiche
There was a chef famous for his quiche
Crowds came in and paid lots of baksheesh
Feds came into town
they busted his crown
for his quiche was sprinkled with hashish