Written by
David Fisher
Categories:
animal, farm, funny,
Rear View Air
As soon as we got to the county fair
The country odor got through my nose hair
Coz above some milk pails
We encountered cow tails
Which filled our senses with their dairy-air
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
friendship, thank you, tribute,
Cash Cow
I was blessed by a golden cash cow
She’s a wonderful friend to me now
For those in the know
She goes with the flow
Here’s my tribute, may she take a bow!
12~27~16
Written by
Hilda Greenhough
Categories:
animal, political,
Poll
A farmer drove into town.
Some posters made him frown.
They said, "Go to the Poll".
He said,"In the pasture below?"
"Right now, they're standing a'chowin'".
(To understand this limerick, you must understand that a polled cow has no horns from birth)
Written by
Andrea Dietrich
Categories:
animal,
A Bossy Old Cow - For Contest
A bossy old cow in the street
was rolling while licking its teat!
When it howled like a cat,
I thought: What’s up with that?
Can bossy old cows be in heat?
Inspired by both a poem and the limerick contest of Jan Allison
Written by
Duke Beaufort
Categories:
courage, death, hindi,
Last curtain call
Who knew the exact time and how
The day came for my play's final bow?
The span was compact
I ran for just one act
The encore - now as sacred cow
Written by
Richard Breese
Categories:
animal, farm, giggle, humor, humorous, image, silly,
a cow named mckuen
once an old cow named mckuen
her cud she always was chew'n
we asked please explain
when she crossed our lane
shor beats a' stand'n 'n moo'n.
Written by
Josie Higginson
Categories:
irony,
Cow Limerick
Cow from Calcutter
There once was a Cow from Calcutter,
Who really was quite fond of butter.
She ate it all day,
Instead of her hay,
I think she's a bit of a nutter...
Written by
Deb Wilson
Categories:
funny love, husband,
Who You Callin' Fattie-A Limerick
There was an old woman called Hattie
whose hubby's name for her was fattie.
So she cooked his goose
hung him from a noose
then buried him in a cow pattie!
Written by
Ugwu Cornelius Chidera
Categories:
hilarious,
A Fulani Man
There once was a fulani man,
whose cow was in society ban'.
He bought for't a book
which is greenish in look.
"These are leaves" said the fulani man.
Written by
Carolyn Devonshire
Categories:
funny, moon,
The Man In the Moon's Surprise
The man in the moon crooned such a tune
That the cow jumped over and mooned
But a methane gas
The bovine did pass
The man struck a match and kaboom!
Written by
Richard Breese
Categories:
cheer up, earth, farm, flying, giggle, humor, humorous,
ufo
ufos fly lake erie
and blow air force theory
for each tows signs
flashing these lines
we stole a cow from oleary.
Written by
Jack Horne
Categories:
sexy,
Mary - Bawdy Limerick
I met an old prostitute Mary,
Resembling a cow in a dairy:
She lived to make whoopee,
Her udders were droopy,
With private parts smelly and hairy.
14th June for Roy’s Bawdy limericks II contest
Written by
Drjim Martin
Categories:
funny,
Lazy Cow
Lazy Cow
DrJames EMartin
©May, 2013
The cow loved to chew her cud
As she lay in the cooling mud.
She was lazy you see,
As lazy as could be,
Some would even say she was a dud.
Written by
Richard Breese
Categories:
animal, dog, farm, funny, giggle, humor, pets,
farm dog
once an old dog named percy
licked a farmer quite slurply
then a homeless cow
with mimicked bowwow
licked them both without mercy.
Written by
Jack Ellison
Categories:
food,
Salad, Salad, Salad
Salad, salad, salad, every day of the year
To keep me thin and trim, it's not working I fear
You'd think by now
I'd be slimmer than a cow
This obsession for Big Macs is really severe
Written by
Rajat Kanti Chakrabarty
Categories:
fun, funny, nonsense,
Uncle Scrooge Had Lost His Wallet
Uncle Scrooge had lost his wallet
He went mad and chased a pullet
He fell down the glen
Ended in cow pen
Mr.Scrooge had to bite the bullet
Written by
James Fraser
Categories:
animal, creation, fun, giggle, humor, life, smile,
You Obviously Haven'T Been Listening
Talking to my wife about reincarnation
Creature be, be a creature sensation
Honestly what would you be
A cow your telling me
You obviously haven't been listening
.
Written by
Craig Munn
Categories:
fun, funny,
Revenge
The cow was awful mad,
For the farmer forgot her lad.
So she got out of her stall,
And turned the farmer into a ball,
And played soccer with granddad!!!!!!!!
Written by
Deb Wilson
Categories:
funny, girlfriend-boyfriend
The Indian Giver Love Bandit
He promised to love me forever
Then again he was just being clever
He took back his love
So I gave him a shove
Headfirst in cow dung-my endeavor!
** for Indian Giver contest
sponsored by(Destroyer ((Poet
Written by
Jack Horne
Categories:
lost love,
Bare Finger
His finger is really quite bare;
The ring is no longer on there,
But he's used to it now
And he sees she's a cow -
No dripping about her affair.
*dripping – beef fat or slang for whinging
for PD's contest
Written by
Jack Ellison
Categories:
fun,
Mary Had a Little Chicken
Mary had a little lamb, she also had a chicken
It's little beak hurt, but not as much as the lamb's kickin'
Imagine now
If she had a cow
Oh my love sure would go out to this munchkin
© Jack Ellison 2015
Written by
Jack Ellison
Categories:
humor,
A Lady From Greece
There once lived a lady in Greece
Who was always in trouble with police
Walking around nude
Like a cow she mooed
Offering young Greeks a taste of her t(r)eats
© Jack Ellison 2015
Written by
Larry Belt
Categories:
funny
Mr Cow
I had a cow with only one udder
She never gave milk to make my butter
Her udder was hard to pull
But I found out she's a bull
Thinking back now really makes me shudder
Written by
Jack Ellison
Categories:
silly,
No Better Than a Cow
I'm on a big roll, so don't stop me now
My best stuff can be seen just over the next brow
Sometimes lose it quite quick
Writing it down is the trick
My memory stinks, it's no better than a cow
Written by
Angela G
Categories:
funny
If You Want To Stay Married, Leave the Tv On
Your mouth noise is polluting the table
You sound like a cow in the stable
Must you slurp your spaghetti
Don't dare call me petty
Thank God we have TV with cable