i knew a bee that could sing
it worked for a queen and king
but they preferred honey
and paid it no money
now it sings backup for sting.
A nudist whose first name was Billy
Got stung by a bee on his willy
It swelled to a great size
One he couldn’t disguise
So he hid by a meadow lily
I think that I shall never see
A quiltin' bee or spellin' bee
A-skitterin' to and fro
But 'tis better yet to know
This species won't be stingin' me
Robert LHinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
© All Rights Reserved
A fat man while clambering up a tree
To pluck pears was stung by a swarm of bee
Alas! With a heavy thud,
He landed in the dry mud
Bees stung on his limp prick and he couldn’t flee!
On a summer day so hot and sunny
I watched a bee in a hive make honey
And as I went to pass
He stung me in the grass (fooled you, didn’t I)
And I said hey man, that isn’t funny
Macho Bee had a really big stinger.
Lady Bird, when aroused, was a singer.
When they heard her loud COO,
all the wood creatures knew
that first date must have been a humdinger!
For Line Gauthier's Bite Size Poem No.10 Poetry Contest
Float like a butterfly sting like a bee
Dancing and prancing, “Frazer can’t hit me”
Frazer’s punch was a killer
Smoking hot in Manila
Refutes the Rope a dope prophet Ali!!
For Contest; My Favorite Sports_ Limerick
For and in honor of Royal Trrevino
I am Buttercup, swaying in breeze
Ah Ah Choo! Something's making me sneeze.
Just hold on...now I see
It's that darn Busy Bee
And he's swapping my pollen for fleas.
for 'Are you Bugged'...and in response to James Fraser's 'Pollen Calling'
Said a bee to a bird , we can't fail ,
With your sweet sexy song , bang-in-scale
When I'm lovin' you..please
Don't fart , belch or sneeze
'Cause there might be a sting in the tail
Mistake can’t cause a fetch of honey from a busy bee hive
ridiculous is an instant transit from sleep to a sea-dive
a decision lands one in distant Germany
or a palace of whores despite how many
don’t blame the devil after having the satisfaction live.
A curious bee and a silly wasp were stuck in a cup of pee
The two insects begged the old man to set them free
“I don’t want to die” cried the poor pathetic bee
The ridiculous wasp said “I am trying to flee, help!”
Hours later, two tiny poos were floating in the acidic pee
Buzzing bee, keep the sun in your sights,
packing nectar down snug in your tights.
So adroit at your task
that I just had to ask:
" Is that dinner on all of your flights?"
Blinded and saving the love talk in the dark
In a sensuous connection came a spark
An active mind bee-lined for a kiss
Shilly-shally bemused as lass remarks
Lips to nose in a clear view face, turns dark.
There was a gigolo who swallowed a bee
It pained him from stomach to knee.
But with a shout and curse
He saw things get worse.
It buzzed him from a he to a she.
There was a lady from Connet
Who got a bee in her bonnet.
She untied the string
To be rid of the thing
But her mouth opened upon it.
One day when I ran out of money,
I knew where to get me free honey,
But forgetting one thing
That the owners do sting,
And black eyes from bee stings ain’t funny.
I have an old dog named Sweet Pea
More wily than sweet, you’d agree
Who runs the house?
Not me or my spouse
No, our dog, Sweet Pea, the queen bee
* For our little girl, Sweet Pea, after 15 years with us, she is a part of the family.
In a land far away is a tree,
In which there lives a small bee,
His continuous buzz,
Is the work that he does,
It seems like a good job to me.
There once was a lad named Nate
Who in the spelling bee did participate
But the audience did blush
As poor Nate got flush
After failing to spell constipate
Buzzy the busy bumble bee
Has his sharp sting on aim at me.
"If you want my honey
Then show me your money.
Buzzy the bee does not work free."
For Carolyn's and John's bug contest
Tied for no.3
I sat next to the Duchess at tea.
It was worse than I thought would be.
A bee sat on her nose
The Duchess turn'd verbose
When it stung her right there but not me.
Dorian Petersen Potter
'Tis a tree sloth that I be,
Dwelling in a tree sloth's tree.
When a worker bee
Asks what's up with me,
I say, "Sloth shall set you free."
Smoking Joe Fraser, no sting as a bee…
That knack resides with Mohammed Ali!
Though killer in Manila…
Very persistent fellow,
Smoked the rope a dope folly, by golly!
For: Limerick Contest
In honor of Linda-Marie, (S.HOf P.S
once a young fellow named lee
liked to converse with a bee
one day in a store
it caused an uproar
sitting to chat on his knee.
Keep your tentacles away from me
Touching your body stings like a bee
Pardon me, for I am on the lam
Foot crushed by the shell of a clam
Pray you won’t follow me as I flee