Written by
Tim Smith
Categories:
for her,
Trump and the Beaver - For Jan
Out in the woods Trump took a nap
Under an oak dripping of sap
pants to his knees
what a big sleaze
Fresh beaver still caught in his trap
*I do not endorse this message and no actual
beavers were hurt in this poem
Written by
John Lawless
Categories:
animal, confusion, humor,
Vestigial Vagabond
The tail of a beaver, bill of a duck
yet they pull it off with honor and pluck
made with spare parts
they capture our hearts
with DNA tests that read WTF
©8/31/2018
for Any Animal Or Creature Limerick Poetry Contest
Written by
Jack Ellison
Categories:
fun,
A Mature Beaver
A young lad masquerading as an old geezer
Looking for a lady who owns a mature beaver
One with mucho bucks
Still able to cluck
And willing to take pity on a geezer still eager
Written by
Robert Gorelick
Categories:
humor,
Eddie Haskell
David and Ricky were cute, at best
Bud Anderson was a clueless pest
But that enduring, fun rascal
our dear Eddie Haskell
provided a refreshing, honest zest!
On A Lim Contest
Sponsor: Joseph May
from the TV show "Leave It To Beaver"
Written by
M. L. Kiser
Categories:
animal, fun, funny, humor, humorous, nature,
The Wolf
One day a wolf sat,
Awaiting a tasty cat.
Then he spotted a beaver;
His teeth, they cleaved her;
He’s in heaven now…bear attacked!
Written by
Russell Sivey
Categories:
funny, life, day,
The Flu Enveloped Me
I started the day wholly fresh and free
Allowing this flu to envelope me
I sparked a fever
Puked up a beaver
Waiting for the day I’ll heal so fully
Russell Sivey
Entrant into ~Gwendolen~'s "The Sneezing Limerick Contest"
Written by
M. L. Kiser
Categories:
animal, dog, food, fun, funny, nature,
The Wolf
One day, a wolf sat,
By a babbling brook,
Awaiting a tasty snack.
He spotted a beaver,
His teeth, they cleaved her
Then by hungry bear, he was attacked;
Now he’s in Heaven without his pack.
Written by
Mark Koplin
Categories:
humor,
Leave It To Beaver
Oh you poor dear, no comments either?
Maybe you were a little to hard on the beaver.
I’m sure some you will get.
You are their prized pet.
Just like Eddy Haskell and Ward Cleaver.
Written by
Jack Ellison
Categories:
appreciation,
Like a Beaver
You've heard the expression, “works like a beaver”
Well ladies of the night are called “beaver retrievers”
They make big bucks
Sure enjoy their time (I know, should rhyme)
When it's over, it's definitely a tension reliever
Written by
Gershon Wolf
Categories:
celebrity, remember, rude,
'eddie Haskell'
Do you recall that ornery rascal
Who played the role of one 'Eddie Haskell' --
Good morning, MrsCleaver
And how's my friend, 'the Beaver?' --
Like a laughing hyena ~ or jackal
Written by
Robert Gorelick
Categories:
fruit, funny, humor,
Kumquat
Rush to my house I have kumquats, you said
They're ripe, moist and sweet, I'm right here in bed
An eager beaver, I raced
But my high hopes were misplaced
Your spouse was eating your kumquat instead
Written by
Rico Leffanta
Categories:
word play,
Gun Control
Red Ryder had a BB gun
That Playboy bunnies could outrun
Their fluffy tails
Alerted males
A Little Beaver is more fun!
Written by
Jack Ellison
Categories:
fun,
Happy Typhus
There's a store I frequent they've got really good prices
Can't remember it's name, Naughty Beaver or Happy Typhus
Now I remember
Twas a jungle defender
Giant TIGER it is, needed all my mental devices
Written by
Jack Ellison
Categories:
symbolism,
Canada's Icon
Farts: an expression of our most inner thoughts
Can't get more sincere, than toots from apricots
Fruity smelling at best
Like a beaver over stressed
Canada's national symbol, hard-working knobs
Written by
Rico Leffanta
Categories:
relationship,
Queen of the Chop
The Queen of the local beaver
Is crowned "Saturday Night Fever"
But all of her dates
Meet quite dreadful fates
Her dad is the Rabbi Cleaver