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Limerick Poems About Sex | Sex Limerick Poems
Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: farm, humorous, sexy,


A curvaceous lady named Mary Just loved having sex in the dairy When smothered with whipped cream Her beau would lick her clean… His Calorie intake was scary!!! 14th June 2016

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Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: humorous,


Two autos both tried to have sex. A pity they both were such wrecks! With great apprehension, One lost its suspension. Old banger sex – oh so complex! 12~21~14 Contest: East Jesus Sponsor: Roy Jerden Checked using how many Syllables 8,8,6,6,8 ~awarded 3rd place~

Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: humorous,


A sex mad codger named Bill Swallowed a Viagra pill His todger did rise - You should see the size It sure gave his wife a thrill 17th Feb 2015

Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: humorous,


He wanted it hot with lots of spice 
Not sugary sweet and tasting nice 
Oh big boy your a looker  
We had sex on the cooker
I’m so pleased I took your advice

Jan Allison
17th September 2014

Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: giggle, humorous, sexy,


A young gigolo called Timothy Gave sex for an exorbitant fee But his passionate style Sure made all ladies smile… (I’m hoping that he’s got room for me!) 02~13~17

Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: body, humorous, me,


Folks know me as ‘poetry Jan’ But soupers I once was a man … In a very long op My male bits got the chop And I altered my name from Stan! HAPPY APRIL FOOLS DAY SOUPERS!!!! 1st April 2018

Poem Details | by Rico Leffanta |
Categories: betrayal, culture, love, lust, marriage, miracle, relationship,

Love Versus Lust

Some folk are prone to love affairs
For sex rewards the one who dares
They are hot to trot
Because they forgot
Miracles don't happen in pairs!

Poem Details | by Keith Trestrail |
Categories: funny, humorous,

Safe Sex

 She said "I'm not some cheap bimbo whore
 but have six kids and don't want no more”.
   Relax I said - my name’s Rex
   and I do practice safe sex,
 it’s true, I always lock the car door!

Poem Details | by James Fraser |
Categories: best friend, blessing, funny, graduation, humor, humorous, men,

What a Subject

Two old codgers were talking about sex And ones question popped up next This Viagra have you tried For me I can't decide Mm, that's a hard one,what a subject

Poem Details | by Robert Candler |
Categories: age, appreciation, beauty, body, fantasy, girlfriend, money,

What A Way To Go

An old man bought her gems and he smiled,
Knowing where they would be in a while...
Sex with a young beauty,
Great legs, boobs and booty.
If he died, he'd be going in style.

Poem Details | by Paul Callus |
Categories: computer, silly,


I fell in love with a computer
Not for the sex, for it is neuter
It came without name
Oh my! What a shame!
I googled one and up came Luther.

Limerick Contest II
Sponsor: Jan Allison
Placed 1st
20th February, 2016  

Poem Details | by Jack Ellison |
Categories: passion,

Sex Is The Question

Sex is not the is the question “Yes” is the answer..but it's only a suggestion The choice is yours Your illnesses it cures The one thing that tweaks your tweaker without exception

Poem Details | by Andrea Dietrich |
Categories: funny, giggle,


One day with her pet lizard, on a
warm beach lay the sex goddess Shawna.
One who ogled her bust
tried to claim he was just
enthralled by her lovely iguana!

For john freeman's Giggle 2 Contest

Poem Details | by Lindsay Laurie |
Categories: nonsense,

Sex Change

We once knew a fella named Abel,
Who loved to jump razor wire cable,
One day he made a slip;
Heard a howl and a rip...
So now we address him as Mabel.

Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: funny, travel,

The ''Dirty Old Man'' syndrome song

When traveling among the throng
His thoughts have too often gone wrong
Alluring effects
Of the opposite sex
Have the devil stomping his prong

Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: humorous,


Jim flicked off the bedroom wall LIGHT With HOPE of a wild sex filled night But the tone of his wife Made him fear for his life Guess she’s keeping her legs shut tight L & H Contest – Sponsor Catie Lindsey 05~21~15

Poem Details | by Paul Schneiter |
Categories: humor,

Sex Change

There was a gigolo who swallowed a bee
It pained him from stomach to knee.
But with a shout and curse
He saw things get worse.
It buzzed him from a he to a she.

Poem Details | by Andrea Dietrich |
Categories: parody

Worst(Worstest?) Limrick Evah

Heres a rilly lame limrick for ya-
Write hear I'll change the beet!
also I ain't bin usin end rime
An this old line is whey to long for a forth line.
Kin ya gess how many words was spellt rong?
hummm, is that fiv or sex lines I needs?

For P.D.'s "My Worst Poem Ever" Contest

Poem Details | by Jack Ellison |
Categories: fun,

Is Rough Sex Dirty

Woody Allen once pondered, “Is rough sex dirty?” Replied “Only if it's done right”, his eyes quite blurry Voice trembling and shaking During this joyous undertaking Apologized for his words which came out quite slurry

Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: funny, introspection, life, philosophy,

like it or not--it's here to stay

Inventive minds can be inspired  
Great ideas in time may be sired
High fashion and style
Are acquired for a while
But in the brain sex is hard wired

Poem Details | by Barbara Gorelick |
Categories: funny

Avoiding the IRS

There once was a woman  named Roxanne
Who had sex with many a fine man
She charged a big fee
And made them agree
To never disclose the business she ran

For Deb's contest...

Poem Details | by Theresa CW |
Categories: fun, humor,

Fruit Loops

Fruit Loops

There’s a wild woman who lives in Kamloops
She wants to have excessive wild sex groups
Folks say she doesn’t knows
She looks might dirty gross
She’s not even erotic like fruit loops.

Written: 6/11/15
Theresa Marie

Poem Details | by David Fisher |
Categories: funny, sexy,

Basque In Sex

When I traveled to the region of Basque,
I met a girl of whom sex I did ask
She said, “Yeah, sure mister,
If it includes my sister.”
So I told her, “Sure, I can multitask.”

Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: humorous, sexy,


A flighty young lady from Torbay Got seen having sex in a doorway She blushed bright scarlet red Said I like it in bed But this is just part of our foreplay! 12th April 2016

Poem Details | by Jack Ellison |
Categories: humorous,

Till He Accidentally Touched Her Tortilla

There once was a gal named Georgina About sex with a boy, had no idea Thought sleeping with Jim Meant innocent kibbutzim Till he accidentally touched her tortilla © Jack Ellison 2015

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