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Limerick Poems About Sex | Sex Limerick Poems
Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: farm, humorous, sexy,

MARY IN THE DAIRY

A curvaceous lady named Mary Just loved having sex in the dairy When smothered with whipped cream Her beau would lick her clean… His Calorie intake was scary!!! 14th June 2016

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Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: humorous,

HERBIE RIDES AGAIN

Two autos both tried to have sex. A pity they both were such wrecks! With great apprehension, One lost its suspension. Old banger sex – oh so complex! 12~21~14 Contest: East Jesus Sponsor: Roy Jerden Checked using how many Syllables 8,8,6,6,8 ~awarded 3rd place~


Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: humorous,

OLD BILL - BAWDY LIMERICK

A sex mad codger named Bill Swallowed a Viagra pill His todger did rise - You should see the size It sure gave his wife a thrill 17th Feb 2015


Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: humorous,

FEELING HOT HOT HOT

He wanted it hot with lots of spice 
Not sugary sweet and tasting nice 
Oh big boy your a looker  
We had sex on the cooker
I’m so pleased I took your advice

Jan Allison
17th September 2014



Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: giggle, humorous, sexy,

JUST A GIGOLO

A young gigolo called Timothy Gave sex for an exorbitant fee But his passionate style Sure made all ladies smile… (I’m hoping that he’s got room for me!) 02~13~17


Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: body, humorous, me,

SEX CHANGE

Folks know me as ‘poetry Jan’ But soupers I once was a man … In a very long op My male bits got the chop And I altered my name from Stan! HAPPY APRIL FOOLS DAY SOUPERS!!!! 1st April 2018


Poem Details | by Rico Leffanta |
Categories: betrayal, culture, love, lust, marriage, miracle, relationship,

Love Versus Lust

Some folk are prone to love affairs
For sex rewards the one who dares
They are hot to trot
Because they forgot
Miracles don't happen in pairs!


Poem Details | by James Fraser |
Categories: best friend, blessing, funny, graduation, humor, humorous, men,

What a Subject

Two old codgers were talking about sex And ones question popped up next This Viagra have you tried For me I can't decide Mm, that's a hard one,what a subject
.


Poem Details | by Robert Candler |
Categories: age, appreciation, beauty, body, fantasy, girlfriend, money,

What A Way To Go

An old man bought her gems and he smiled,
Knowing where they would be in a while...
Sex with a young beauty,
Great legs, boobs and booty.
If he died, he'd be going in style.


Poem Details | by Paul Callus |
Categories: computer, silly,

Computer

I fell in love with a computer
Not for the sex, for it is neuter
It came without name
Oh my! What a shame!
I googled one and up came Luther.


-----------------------
Limerick Contest II
Sponsor: Jan Allison
Placed 1st
20th February, 2016  


Poem Details | by Lindsay Laurie |
Categories: nonsense,

Sex Change

We once knew a fella named Abel,
Who loved to jump razor wire cable,
One day he made a slip;
Heard a howl and a rip...
So now we address him as Mabel.


Poem Details | by Andrea Dietrich |
Categories: funny, giggle,

Iguana

One day with her pet lizard, on a
warm beach lay the sex goddess Shawna.
One who ogled her bust
tried to claim he was just
enthralled by her lovely iguana!

For john freeman's Giggle 2 Contest


Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: funny, travel,

The ''Dirty Old Man'' syndrome song

When traveling among the throng
His thoughts have too often gone wrong
Alluring effects
Of the opposite sex
Have the devil stomping his prong


Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: humorous,

LIGHT AND HOPE LIMERICK

Jim flicked off the bedroom wall LIGHT With HOPE of a wild sex filled night But the tone of his wife Made him fear for his life Guess she’s keeping her legs shut tight L & H Contest – Sponsor Catie Lindsey 05~21~15


Poem Details | by Paul Schneiter |
Categories: humor,

Sex Change

There was a gigolo who swallowed a bee
It pained him from stomach to knee.
But with a shout and curse
He saw things get worse.
It buzzed him from a he to a she.


Poem Details | by Jack Ellison |
Categories: passion,

Sex Is The Question



Sex is not the answer..sex is the question “Yes” is the answer..but it's only a suggestion The choice is yours Your illnesses it cures The one thing that tweaks your tweaker without exception


Poem Details | by Jack Ellison |
Categories: fun,

Is Rough Sex Dirty



Woody Allen once pondered, “Is rough sex dirty?” Replied “Only if it's done right”, his eyes quite blurry Voice trembling and shaking During this joyous undertaking Apologized for his words which came out quite slurry


Poem Details | by Andrea Dietrich |
Categories: parody

Worst(Worstest?) Limrick Evah

Heres a rilly lame limrick for ya-
Write hear I'll change the beet!
also I ain't bin usin end rime
An this old line is whey to long for a forth line.
Kin ya gess how many words was spellt rong?
hummm, is that fiv or sex lines I needs?

For P.D.'s "My Worst Poem Ever" Contest


Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: funny, introspection, life, philosophy,

like it or not--it's here to stay

Inventive minds can be inspired  
Great ideas in time may be sired
High fashion and style
Are acquired for a while
But in the brain sex is hard wired


Poem Details | by Theresa CW |
Categories: fun, humor,

Fruit Loops

Fruit Loops


There’s a wild woman who lives in Kamloops
She wants to have excessive wild sex groups
Folks say she doesn’t knows
She looks might dirty gross
She’s not even erotic like fruit loops.

Written: 6/11/15
Theresa Marie


Poem Details | by Barbara Gorelick |
Categories: funny

Avoiding the IRS

There once was a woman  named Roxanne
Who had sex with many a fine man
She charged a big fee
And made them agree
To never disclose the business she ran


For Deb's contest...


Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: humorous, sexy,

SHE LOVES IT OUTDOORS

A flighty young lady from Torbay Got seen having sex in a doorway She blushed bright scarlet red Said I like it in bed But this is just part of our foreplay! 12th April 2016


Poem Details | by David Fisher |
Categories: funny, sexy,

Basque In Sex

When I traveled to the region of Basque,
I met a girl of whom sex I did ask
She said, “Yeah, sure mister,
If it includes my sister.”
So I told her, “Sure, I can multitask.”


Poem Details | by Jack Ellison |
Categories: humorous,

With Her Knickers On My Head



Houdini was a master of illusion it's said Escaping from handcuffs while chained to a bed Like the sex games we play When our partner must obey Wearing a mask with her knickers on our heads © Jack Ellison 2015


Poem Details | by Dustin Craig |
Categories: funny, people, satire,

Cheap Sex

There once was a girl from Quebec
Who really wanted to have quick sex
Pants below her knees
She's waiting to please
Definition of a sex object


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