Andrea was late - drove at the speed of light
Traffic cops chased her - she got such a fright
The cop got out his book
Gave her a stern look
She’s off to traffic school so she now gets it right
Posted with full permission of Andrea (speedy) Dietrich
2nd April 2015
Waking up for school was hard enough,
still half asleep not ready for the bus,
breakfast on the dot,
snap, crackle and pop,
noisy Rice Krispy's helping us wake up.
Under the lights on Friday night.
High school football starting to ignite.
Merciless to everyone.
This is war, not for fun.
Winning state is a beautiful sight.
There once was a teacher from Crete
Whose foot size was very petite,
Well her students did plot
And to high school they brought,
Some shoes for some oversize feet.
It’s true! I heard it myself!
No academic learning tomorrow!
The roads are too icy,
and travel is dicey
try to contain all your sorrow.
A lazy student known as Burt,
To parents and teachers was curt.
With little knowledge,
Flunked out of college;
Played stock market and lost his shirt!
School work leads to thrilling careers
Say hooray hip hip--give three cheers!
A student's new skill
Brings success just until
The bill for the loan's in arrears!
There once was a boy called Bum
Who shaped his finger in school like a gun
They told him he failed
Threw him in jail
His education is over and done
Sometimes my work is the pits -
Teenagers popping their zits
With consummate art
They burp and they fart …
I still love my job to bits!
17th November 2015
Once long ago on a school visit to the zoo
My little one had just begun elementary school
High up on a tree branch sat a lonely owl
With his huge eyes shut, he could pass for any old fowl
Suddenly, he opened them and questioned, “Who? Who?”
When laughter was heard in the hall,
The principle thought it was gall.
When down fell his britches,
The class burst in stitches.
The principle burst through the wall.
Refer to Twain's statement: The human race has but one really affective weapon, and that is laughter.
i have this friend back in high school
she was known to be one of the most beautiful
people didn't notice it's just her make-up
and when a sudden rain came and wash her face up
poor creature, she was laughed by all
The Hooky, Cookie, Rookie
They say his nick-name is “Cookie.”
From school he’d often play hooky.
He was no fool,
Was actually quite cool,
It is evident he was no rookie.
There was a grade-school dropout named Truperter
Whose neighbors in his town said couldn’t be stupidter.
He said the earth was flat,
Dinosaurs were due back.
And he swore Donald Trump has a condo on Jupiter.
My little one is going to school
The joy on his face and mine is so cool
His first day is monday
I hope he will be okay
While I'm at home acting a fool
Pen flies when out of sight,
Boy, I hope that I'm right.
No award for me,
What a shame that'd be,
At least I gave it all my might.
A school teacher named Miss Shaw
Though well-endowed wore no bra.
Things slipped and jiggled
Bounced and wiggled
Pupils are still awed by what they saw.
Once a School-girl who didn’t like babies
Once a School-girl who didn’t like babies
Thought it’d be better than having scabies
So she engaged a Boor
To bore through the stuck door:
That’s how she got both babies and scabies.
© TWignesan – Paris, 2013
In grammar school the boys had fun
Even though not one had a gun
They'd stalk a girl
Trying to shoot squirrel
But not one ever even saw one
There's a fellow named Robert O'Toole.
He's the principal down at the school.
He cut classes today,
So the gossips all say.
Went fishing for bass in the car pool.
Accepted to medical school
Too old but in the entrance pool
Where is the back door?
There's my dorm with a drawer
Since I’m a cadaver quite cool
Well here we are the last day of school
Let's hit the beach the park and even the pool
The kids are home for the summer
As I start to think I begin to wonder
They going to be home with me hey that's not cool
Tis splendor in the grass these coming summer days
America’s youth can have their privileged adolescent ways
Swimming and playing or simply being laid back
They have little worries without any teacher’s flack
Enrich they youngish self before the inevitable groans of early Mondays
There once was a boy, named Abdul;
Went to get a job, fresh out of school
All dressed up like July,
With a bow and a tie;
But left his fly open, what a fool!
The story of school starting is here
It began with a bell and a cheer
Bob brought a talking chicken
My, my, what the sickens
Harridan Teacher silenced them with fear