Limerick Poems About Pets | Pets Limerick Poems
Poem Details | by Linda-Marie SweetHeart |
Categories: funny, christmas, christmas,

Pets on Parade

"Pets on Parade" on Christmas Eve two kitty cats were sleeping as Santa Claus climbed down the chimney creeping Excalibur started to purr Gabriel raised his black fur poor Santa was startled and began weeping. while Santa was chased by playful felines trotting toward them a band of hungry canines sweet Venus the white Wstie was growing quite testy for commotion interrupted her night sublime. Thor and Thunder twin midnight blue great danes frolicked in fun as Santa reached for red candy canes they took giant licks opened Santa's bag of tricks as Raider the Shepherd smeared frosty windowpanes. pretty pets on parade on Christmas Eve had a jolly good time you best believe sharing cookies and milk with the Moon smooth as silk and Santa was so happy to leave. *For SKAT'S Calling All Pet Poems.


Poem Details | by jack horne |
Categories: animal,

Animal Magnetism

A pet more exotic I'd wanted.

A pet to be groomed and then flaunted.

not a dog or a cat

something cooler than that!

I began my search feeling undaunted





In a pet store I came on a ferret.

Such a pain he was! How did I bear it?

Under doors and through cracks

He'd escape from meAAAACH!!

So I traded him in for a parrot.




Well, the parrot just wanted to fly!

And that bird knew more bad words than I.

When he called me a whore,

I threw open the door:

“Now you’re getting your wish, BirdBYE BYE!





A boa constrictor I bought,

He’d like to be cuddled, I thought,

But he wrapped and he squeezed,

As I gasped and I wheezed,

And offered the rat that I’d caught.

 

A bowl of piranha I won -

I played Baccarat with a nun -

And they wiggled their bums,

So I tickled their tums,

But bones ’stead of fingers aint fun.





My elderly aunt sent a text,

Suggesting tarantulas next,

But my spider alas,

Took a bite of my ass:

My pet-owning hobby is hexed.





I went to the pet shop, I swear,

But nothing I wanted was there -

To my pets I am prey,

So I went on eBay,

And purchased a big teddy bear.


for Darkness' Grab A Partner collaboration contest, written with a good Soup friend


Poem Details | by Andrea Dietrich |
Categories: humorous,

Animal Magnetism

A pet more exotic I'd wanted.
A pet to be groomed and then flaunted.
Not a dog or a cat -
Something cooler than that!
I began my search feeling undaunted

In a pet store I came on a ferret.
Such a pain he was! How did I bear it?
Under doors and through cracks
He'd escape from meAAAACH!!
So I traded him in for a parrot.

Well, the parrot just wanted to fly!
And that bird knew more bad words than I.
When he called me a whore,
I threw open the door:
“Now you’re getting your wish, BirdBYE BYE!

A boa constrictor I bought,
He’d like to be cuddled, I thought,
But he wrapped and he squeezed,
As I gasped and I wheezed,
And offered the rat that I’d caught.
 
A bowl of piranha I won -
I played Baccarat with a nun -
And they wiggled their bums,
So I tickled their tums,
But bones ’stead of fingers aint fun.

My elderly aunt sent a text,
Suggesting tarantulas next,
But my spider alas,
Took a bite of my ass:
My pet-owning hobby is hexed.

I went to the pet shop, I swear,
But nothing I wanted was there -
To my pets I am prey,
So I went on eBay,
And purchased a big teddy bear.


For the "Grab a Partner" ContestTo see
who I collaborated with, read my comment
under the poem.


Poem Details | by Matthew Anish |
Categories: humorous,

Another Limerick

There was a young man from China
Who couldn't think of anything finer
Than to smoke cigarettes - play with his pets 
Eat out at an all night diner


Poem Details | by Carolyn Devonshire |
Categories: humor,

Gone with the Wind

That old bedroom fan makes too much noise
But he sweats after nights with the boys
     I turn and pull the sheets up
     Good Lord, on beans they did sup
Thank goodness the fan his farts deploys

Coming home late, he now hits the couch
Spicy foods growl in his waistline pouch
     Old tabby hisses at him
     Rover’s expression’s quite grim
If our pets die from foul wind, I’ll grouch

“Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn,”
Said Rhett before he went on the lam
     My spouse won’t be hearing these
     The next time he cuts the cheese
I’ll clog him with a battering ram



*Written May 18, 2014


Poem Details | by Carolyn Devonshire |
Categories: animals, funny

A Floridian's Pet of Choice

Although most pets are cuddly and furry
Like playful pups and kittens furry
     My choice of pet may astound
     Not many of these around
But this one needs little care or worry

At the risk of being called a weirdo
My pet of choice is a scaled, green gecko
     Florida swamps filled with flies
     Cockroaches grow giant size
Request already denied by GEICO

These reptiles hide away during the day
They require no food; on insects they prey
     Geckos don’t warm laps at night
     Dine on pests that fright or bite
And your insect fears they’ll surely allay


*For Francine Roberts’ “Pick a Pet” Contest
Written July 3, 2011


Poem Details | by Jack Ellison |
Categories: fun,

Our Own Little Oasis



Everything's about satisfying our personal pleasures Creating our own little oasis with a bed of feathers But sometime's thorns Disrupt the norms Instead of cats and dogs, our pets are heifers © Jack Ellison 2015