He held my hand, not one word was spoken
Then a ring he offered as a token
He could not ask for marriage
For fear I might disparage
His eyes conveyed sentiments unspoken
* Entry for Adeleke's "Unspeakable Love" contest
To get hitched, have kids and all that jazz
is a goal in life, that most everyone has!
Don't make it your solution,
although, Marriage is, an institution
the same is true of Alcatraz!
Said Seamus to his wife, with a wink
Since I cannae go out for a drink
I'm sure me and you
Can find something to do
Let me hug you, while both of us think
Some folk are prone to love affairs
For sex rewards the one who dares
They are hot to trot
Because they forgot
Miracles don't happen in pairs!
There was a girl, of I thought
I loved her so much, a ring I bought
Thinking of happy marriage
To propose I summed up all my courage
Unfortunately, she wasn’t ready to tie the knot.
Before the "I do" she must choose
A man that does well in dance shoes
His psyche gives a clue
When employing step two
Ply him to the limit with booze
My wife she says that at housework I suck,
she yelled "pick up a broom you idle schmuck!"
But babe, cleanin and dustin
crimps my drinkin and lustin,
but she said "no dustin, no lustin!"...WTF!
The vicar surveyed her wide girth
Was scared that in church she’d give birth
He raised his eyebrows
Then rushed through their vows..
He wasn’t adept at childbirth!
Inspired by the poem ‘Decision Needed’ by Maurice Rigoler
13TH April 2016
That's a week the wife has been missing
For years I've so longed this hoping
Prepare for the worst the Police said
Panic thoughts in my head
The Charity shop was not my so wishing
It was the sixth wedding for daughter Judy
who was quite plain and hardly a beauty.
Time came to give away the bride
whereupon her Father replied
"five times I've tried--I've done my duty."
The wife plans a spree to buy all
With husband on board at the mall
But as this takes place
He just looks for a space
To sit on a bench in the hall
Once upon a time, thirty years ago,
In front of a priest I stood with my beau.
“Over time”, he hailed;
“The secret will be unveiled”,
“Of a truly happy marriage”; but I still don’t know.
A husband's mistake in the sack
His marriage might seem to attack
Maria got hurt
By one little squirt
And Arnold can't say "I'll be back"
The exchange of vows begins the Journey
love, patience and trust, the needed money
to make every meal
and open every seal
one where bitter leaf spices much honey
has three rings - Engagement rings,
Wedding rings and Sufferings;
Like a Violin lover,
after the music's over,
Ah, attached still are the strings!
"Limerick" contest by Jan Allison
Once there was a man called Ice, the Dice
Yearned for love, marriage and children
trapped rich Cinderella by trick and style
Cinderella turned “idiot Ice” “intellect vapor”
Bloody Is vapor smoke?
My wife always says I’m the best
A feeling which brought me much zest
One night wild thoughts flew
In search of a clue
I wondered just who were the rest
wife and I are living in Nanticoke
my wife and I aren’t rich nor are we broke
she’s working more than I am at this time
being the man of the house is no crime
my third marriage isn’t a joke
Rick was an ineptly clad lad
whose wardrobe was shockingly bad.
The he got a sweetheart
with taste like a fine art
who converted him from plain to plaid.
A chance of going to the prom can be so sublime
Spare no expense, even if it is your last dime
It's worth the money
Unlike marriage, you can only do it one time!
She’s a woman of every man’s desire
Slam her and she’ll leave you on fire
She’s a sexy lookin foxy mama
I want her next to me in me hummer
When I see her the subject of marriage I will inquire
There once was a pretty girl from Maine
That her beauty spread to Spain
She didn't want to marry
Because the man's name was Larry
So the people thought her insane
NOTE: I'm having a ball finding all my old poetryI wrote this when I was 11! So much fun reading my old things:D
A man stands no chance with a woman,
With red eyes she schemes in a coven,
So scolded or not,
If he wants a shot,
He'll be better off with a husband.
Man and wife are at opposite ends of the scale
When it comes agreeing on what's important in life, we fail
Obsessed with crumbs on the counter
Berates him till into a battle they flounder
Life's too short to worry about crumbs for peace to prevail
If we each had a clone and one day we met
Walking with our wifey, a happy duet
Would we scream and shout
Or say thanks for the help
To help make our marriage the bestest one yet