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Limerick Poems About Humorous | Humorous Limerick Poems
Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: farm, humorous, sexy,

MARY IN THE DAIRY

A curvaceous lady named Mary Just loved having sex in the dairy When smothered with whipped cream Her beau would lick her clean… His Calorie intake was scary!!! 14th June 2016

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Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: humorous, lust, natural disasters,

OOPS - IT'S A BIT OF A COCK UP

Ted enjoys a quick roll in the hay... He’s sleeping with his buxom P A She confirmed she’s with child Ted baulked, then got quite riled I wonder what his wife’s got to say! 5/26/18


Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: body, clothes, humorous,

TOEING THE LINE - BAWDY LIMERICK

Sue’s panties gave her so much woe - She suffered from dire ‘camel toe’ But with help from soft plastic Her new outline’s fantastic It’s discrete and no one would know! 4/5/18


Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: humorous,

JUICY FRUIT

A busty young lady from Peel Her boobies she couldn't conceal They were such a huge size That she won a first prize For the fruit men most wanted to feel 7th April 2015 I made a bit of a boob on the 2nd line - thanks Paul Callus for your advice



Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: humorous,

HAPPINESS

There once was a young man called Rodger Who's very transfixed with his todger From morning till night He gets his delight Now he shares his bed with his lodger 29 ~12~14


Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: computer-internet, humorous, relationship,

I can only hand it to you

Tapped messages go out direct
With phones it's an easy connect
Thoughts from a finger
In cyberspace linger
But touching's too much to expect


Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: body, humorous, wind,

HE'S HAVING A FART ATTACK

A constipated vicar named Bart Was in church when he dropped a huge fart He said 'Lord I have sinned' For I’ve got pooey wind Blushing scarlet he did soon depart! 26th April 2016


Poem Details | by Andrea Dietrich |
Categories: humorous,

One Mermaid's Lesson

A merman had one stubborn daughter who rebelled against what her dad taught her. When she swam to dry land, she could then understand she was just like a fish - out of water! For the Out of Water Poetry Contest of Sheri Fresonke Harper


Poem Details | by Andrea Dietrich |
Categories: humorous,

Limerick for Sensitive community - a pd contest

I once knew a poet named Andrea.

Assaulted by someone’s hysteria,

she wouldn’t engage,

but feeling some rage,

she fought all night long with insomnia.


(It's kinda true!!!)


Poem Details | by KP Nunez |
Categories: funny, humorous,

THE ADVENTURES OF JIM THE TRIM-AT THE BEACH

On this tropical beach, one hot summer day
Jim the Trim came, his bod to display
Been workin’ out day and night
Made the girls' eyes burn bright
Next, he's running from muscles that sashay





KIM PATRICE NUNEZ
10 April 2015


Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: friendship, humorous, me, poetry, thanks, tribute,

THE QUEEN OF POOP ON POETRY SOUP

I post my poems on poetry soup About farting and guys with brewer’s droop I’ve been given a crown And I won’t let Flo down Be assured I’ll keep on posting my poop! Posted in conjunction with my blog about my amazing gifts from F J Thomas 25th January 2017


Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: body, clothes, for him, humorous,

MY CONTST POM

Poor Viv got caught in his loo (Was sporting his pink tutu) His Mrswas mad Said you ‘stupid lad - your hairy thighs still show through! My contst pom Sponsor’d by Viv Wiggly chckd with how many syllabls 7,7,5,5,7 10~07~16


Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: body, humorous,

CLOWNING AROUND -BAWDY LIMERICK

I remember once dating a clown In the sack he was such a let down He was missing one ball And his todger was small It’s no wonder that he wore a frown! 11~12~17


Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: humorous, inspirational,

WHAT'S IN A NAME






We boarded a flight to Hong Kong Our pilot was called Sum Ting Wong I’d a smile on my face As his flying was ace - His parents sure got his name wrong! 09 04 17


Poem Details | by Agnes Krampe |
Categories: fun, humorous, poetry,

For Jan

Jan always likes a good pun.
She can take any topic and run.
What she writes on a fart
May not make us swoon: "Art!",
But we'll LAUGH,'cause her poems are FUN!


For Jan who reminds me that writing should first and foremost be fun!


Poem Details | by KP Nunez |
Categories: addiction, humorous,

removed for publication






“Sometimes too much drink is barely enough.” Mark Twain, on Alcoholism


05 July 2015
Poem of the Day - 07 July 2015
Write With the Wit of Twain Contest - 4th Place
Sponsor: Andrea Dietrich


Poem Details | by Andrea Dietrich |
Categories: humorous,

Fun Minions

Fun minions give children a thrill. Take note of one thing, if you will. Like a Xanax, the minion, In one actor's opinion, Resembles a big yellow pill! Written Feb24, 2016 for the Minions Poetry Contest of Silent One


Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: christmas, humorous,

YOU'D BETTER NOT POUT

You got a duff gift from your ‘mate’ Too large, in a colour you hate It simply won’t fit You’ll never wear it No nookie mate now you can wait! 12~28~14 A Quintain Christmas - Andrea Dietrich ~awarded 3rd place~


Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: humorous,

HERBIE RIDES AGAIN

Two autos both tried to have sex. A pity they both were such wrecks! With great apprehension, One lost its suspension. Old banger sex – oh so complex! 12~21~14 Contest: East Jesus Sponsor: Roy Jerden Checked using how many Syllables 8,8,6,6,8 ~awarded 3rd place~


Poem Details | by Richard Breese |
Categories: funny, giggle, halloween, humor, humorous, october,

Witch Bakery

There once was a witch whose pies
Were unique as to flavor and size.
When she opened her ovens
She delighted her covens,
With dozens of old crusty guys.


Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: humorous,

LOOK WHAT I FOUND IN THE SINK

I'm thirsty - I needed a drink There lurking in my kitchen sink Lying flat on his back He’s no longer jet black A hedgehog…now he doesn't stink! 11th April 2015


Poem Details | by Tim Ryerson |
Categories: angst, humorous,

A Letter From The IRS

You have disregarded instructions
Thus claiming improper deductions
Send money by mail
And IF you should fail
Your paycheck will suffer reductions...


“The hardest thing in the world to understand is income tax” - Albert Einstein
Submitted for: John Freeman’s contest


Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: christmas, humorous,

YOU MUST LOOK AFTER YOUR ELF

Santa’s little helper felt poorly sick Couldn’t deliver presents for Saint Nick His red nose was gleaming Blue eyes they were streaming I hope that Santa will give him some Vick 24th December 2014


Poem Details | by JAN ALLISON |
Categories: humorous,

DISAPPOINTMENT

Jan said to Darren one day
Do you fancy a roll in the hay
But to his chagrin
Jan asked 'is it in?'
You’re not quite as big as you say!

Based on the poem' our first meeting on the Isle of Man written by Jadazzle united



10th February 2015


Poem Details | by Keith Trestrail |
Categories: fun, humorous,

No Hurry

I hope my poems in their entirety
Live on beyond my notoriety.
  But I sure don't wanna
  Be the guest of honour
Read at the Dead Poet's Society!


            February 2016

 For the Limerick II - For Fun Contest.