You got a duff gift from your ‘mate’
Too large, in a colour you hate
It simply won’t fit
You’ll never wear it
No nookie mate now you can wait!
A Quintain Christmas - Andrea Dietrich
~awarded 3rd place~
I know an amazing poetess named Jan
I know an amazing poetess named Jan
And composing limericks she sure can
Especially about teachers
Who rightly hate cheaters
Exposing them is her very good plan!
When you walk around in the nude
The whole world will say you are rude
Some may hate you
Some may date you
But no one will say you're a prude!
Three cats did share the same house.
Two sweet but one was a grouse.
Two got along great but the third t'was love/hate.
But there isn't a mouse in the house.
~69~ /zodiac sign/
There once was a hermit crab named Nate
Who enjoyed the solitude of his hate
Meeting a lovely lady
A sexy Texan, name P.D.
Finding true hate, trying to online date
(Zodiac Sign Contest)
I'm a defender of democracy
but not its lies and its hypocrisy.
And I loathe Jihad terror,
its soldier and flag bearer
who defend their own atrocity!
LOVE and HATE it can often be said
in relationships, share the same bed
if you're really quite shrewd
you can work out her mood-
either lipstick or bruise on my head!
Of being prejudiced Clyde was accused,
Leaving his reputation a tad bruised.
"If I'm hateful, so be it,
But I hasten to admit,
I hate pizza with anchovies", he mused!
Robert LHinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
(c) 2015 All Rights Reserved
Once there were clowns in a circus,
Whose clown's knew not of their purpose.
None, laughed at their tricks.
Nor their slaps and kicks;
Because Nuns hate fracas,n ruckus
Vaccines are all carefully made
To fight what should make us afraid
Some hate the syringe
And now they should cringe
As hosts the bad germs could invade
He wants a big idea that he can share
How about a contest about "hair'
short, curly, long or straight
Your own colour that you hate,
Try dyeing it, show that you have flair.
Penned on May 182015
Little is known when ignorance apparent
yet those that use it as a weapon arrant,
when implanting seeds of hate
with paradoxical bait,
surly to most of us oh so transparent.
© Harry J Horsman 2015
Battled the mirror since the age of eight.
This on going war inside me I hate.
We all act like its a sin.
I have a slim chance to win.
Today the fight starts to lose weight.
**By Chris Matt
**”Me Against Myself Contest.”
**June 28, 2011
Contradictory remark consists of abusive material.
destruction in relations to develop blaming serial.
Love and trust fires hate and jealous for what purpose!
good friend or partner become enemy with anger dose,
relation cracks as earthquake disaster a concrete building.
My white ball resting upon its tee.
I approach it this first time with glee.
Swing the club and, SMACK!
Club head hits my back.
Ball still here? Worms near by hate me!
The fish avoided the bait.
The fisherman was filled with hate.
His patience was thin,
He could simply not win,
Tomorrow he would sleep in late.
Uh grasshopper I hate what you do
My lawn you sit and you chew
My spray called zits
It kills bloody knits
With my slipper I whip your ass to Timbuktu
You think you have killed my heart
Ending everything like my thought
Little do you know
My hate does it show
I feel better all the days we’re apart
Entrant into Sidney ~ LeeAnn's "A valentine Limerick~..." contest
I really hate predictive text
It makes me think my phone’s been hexed
Try to type in a word
The suggestion’s absurd!
It’s annoying, I’m pretty vexed
In this ugly world of mistrust and hate
A redeeming factor is when love resonates
Above all else
Even a lifetime of wealth
Can't compare to the caring of a loving mate
Down into the water I go,
Floating to the croc pit, below…
What was I thinking,
I must have been drinking,
This is why I hate playing GIJoe...
~For the "To Die For" Limericks Contest~
The Blue Jays home opener is April 8th
Weatherman's predicts snow, hate..hate..hate
Not civilized for sure
Outlook's damn poor
The world's topsy turvy, sure am irate
John Denver's “Leaving On A Jet Plane”
“Babe I hate to go” was the sad refrain
Have second thoughts
Too hasty I talked
Slowing down a bit but methinks I'll remain
They say the neon lights are bright
hate the day but love the night
The show goes on —old broads take flight.
Tarzan could yodel with a beat
A whale can sing melodies sweet
But Donald is mean
His mouthpiece the machine
That disseminates hate with a tweet