You are scissors, and all you can do
is to cut all those paper hearts through.
But I’ve hardened my heart
and before you can start
to destroy me, I’m going to SMASH you!
(Gosh, PD, they won't even permit the ~sign in the title!)
On the Isle of Man lives a Ninja girl
Daring in her act, makes your toesies curl
She has a pretty face
And sips her tea with grace
Be not taken in – she’s no fragile pearl.
Sent with hugs by Lulu` Pascal
Their once was a girl in love
She knew he was sent from above
They danced, they sing they did everthing
But then he deflated in the tub
A good looking plumber named Marty Ridge,
Met the girl of his dreams near a pub fridge,
Even though very attracted to this plumber man,
Sue had to say no when asked for her hand,
She just couldn't be known as, Sue Ridge.
Happy Birthday to this awesome THREE:
to Frank, Kashinath, and P.D.
Those born this day SEVEN
have blessings of Heaven
in wit, charm and poetry!
Resurrecting this oldie for the contest of PD:
You three guys are tops with me!
**REAL CEREAL TRIX**
This girl Rio's, packed lunch in a cereal bowl
Her language almost sounds like espanol
Adding chocolate chunks to her munch
Funny how she ate, cinnamon toast crunch
The real TRIX is to add corn, in anything, NIKKO!
dedicated to RIO~aka NIKKO
A GUN IN HER POCKET
I once knew a woman named Carrie
She was the kind of girl I’d marry
Touched the gun in her pocket
I shot off like a rocket
She had changed herself to be Larry
2nd June, 2016
with one foot short I was hamper’d
believin' my life was 'ncumber’d
when quite by surprise
'peared a girl with cross-eyes
and proclaim’d I was doctor order’d!
© All Rights Reserved
A sweet little girl named Alex.
Always put words in italics.
Plain print wouldn't do.
So when she was through.
They were known as Alex Italics.
There was a young blonde from Stroud
Whose hair made her stand out in a crowd
Til my nail caught in a curl
I declare this ain't no girl
her trousers were standing out proud
There’s a peach of a girl named P.D.
Who is a friend of both you and me
She’s gone away
I already miss her today
Her kind words and Queen Slam poetry
*If you find another sad limerick let me know*
I still haven't found my Miss Right;
the girl with the cat was a fright:
she farted all day
and stank of decay,
then played with her pussy all night...
for the Baggage contest
The girl of my dreams has long flowing hair
Straight from her armpits hanging down with flair
Crossed eyes to boot
Big bum, whatta hoot
A divine creature with flaws here and there
Louisiana Rev had a session,
with a girl in the oldest profession.
Was found with his pants down,
on the wrong side of town.
His next sermon became his confession.
The British sky is seldom blue
And love divine is seldom true
But come on, girl!
Give life a whirl
There'll never be another you!
There once was lad named Sean,
Who thought he was a leprechaun.
He dressed all in green,
And pinched the colleens,
Then danced a jig until dawn.
(Colleen - an Irish girl)
The Cattle Egret is a bird
That chooses to follow the herd
Because it can't find
A girl who is kind
Or a man as good as his word
There once was a girl named Lilly
who often liked to be silly
she put a spoon upon her nose
then she wrote a bit o' prose
and called it mexican chilly !
I once knew a girl from Nantucket
Who chased down a goose, just to pluck it
As she ran, took a spill
So he gave her a quill
And I guess we all know, where he stuck it
Just not clean enough for contests---lol
Was a young girl from Dublin
Decidly fat not thin
Her butt played ping pong
when she wore a thong
watching a three rosary sin
There once was a gal named Lucy,
Who had a beloved pet goosey.
The goose learned to fly,
Which made Lucy cry,
Now there's no more Lucy's goosey.
For Blackeyed Susan's limerick contest
There was a girl, of I thought
I loved her so much, a ring I bought
Thinking of happy marriage
To propose I summed up all my courage
Unfortunately, she wasn’t ready to tie the knot.
There once was a girl named Miss Curry
Whose brows always caused quite a worry.
She went to the spa
To have them waxed raw
And now they're not nearly so furry.
Entered in Andrea's "Show Me the Funny" contest
In my house lives a talking dog, Fred,
who just loves playing games with my head.
As one day I cried,
thinking surely he’d died,
he said, “Geeez, girl,I’m just playing dead!”
For Deb's Limerick II contest
There once was a young lass named Mary,
Whose lips were as sweet as a cherry.
Boys lined up to kiss her,
But then they dismissed her,
Cause Mary was just too darn hairy!
For Andrea' s Perfect Limerick II