The arms of the willow started to sway
and this curious glow rippled my way.
While flirting with my feet,
nature played a song so sweet.
The lake our dance floor 'til the sun's first ray.
On the dance-floor they did a zigzag
But he was an ol’ scallywag:
- “If you feel something hard
- Pay no regard …
It’s just my colostomy-bag”
She’s as dry as a woman can be
No longer wet from dribbling wee
She’s got 'Tom' in her pants
She can run, she can dance
No more leaks, she is now so carefree
30th March 2015
Our Gladys was doing the tango
But her partner was dancing fandango
When her stiletto got placed
In a sensitive space
His castanets swelled like a mango.
I have never liked your phoney guise as a clown
Whose silly painted smile should be turned upside down
I'd like to put red ants
Down your baggy ass pants
And watch you dance until the seat of 'em runs brown
Type casting Pirates of Penzance
Lining up those who’ll sing and dance
Some aced the illusion
Others beyond delusion
Laughing so hard I wet my pants
Submitted on April 8, 2019, for contest PIRATE THEMED LIMERICK sponsored by TANIA KITCHIN - RANKED 4TH
There once was lad named Sean,
Who thought he was a leprechaun.
He dressed all in green,
And pinched the colleens,
Then danced a jig until dawn.
(Colleen - an Irish girl)
Wahine hula dance all night
Swivelling hips beneath moonlight
But comes the dawn
They surf the waves like dynamite!
How popular is the big attraction today
By all accounts, it's “The Trumpeters Ballet”
It's classified first-rate
Though a bit overweight
His followers too, southern cooking on a plate
A cockney from over the water
Had a wife and a tasty young daughter
They would lead him a dance
And he stood not a chance
Cos they both never did what they oughta
Before the "I do" she must choose
A man that does well in dance shoes
His psyche gives a clue
When employing step two
Ply him to the limit with booze
My new English teacher my loins disturb,
her grammar poor but her samba superb.
She asked me at a glance
if I would like to dance?
No Miss, I sheepishly replied...wrong verb!
An Italian once courted my Aunt
Who was bitten by ants in his pants
So he screamed, "Mama Mia!"
"I got the gonorrhea!"
That's when he learned the frying pan dance!
Aquarius met Belle from France
Attracted he asked for a dance
The first was a slow
He stepped on her toe
Did he deserve a second chance?
A NIGHT OF FUN WAS WHAT WE ENJOYED
SANS YOUNG TRACY AND THE JOVIAL BOY
THE BAND WAS ROCKING
WE WERE NOT STOPPING
TO REMINISCE AND DANCE OH WHAT A JOY!
After a wonderful reunion with friends missed for thirty years
There were two dinos who loved the hop
When they got started, they could not stop.
They bounced - flailed about,
Until both passed out,
and detained for affray by a cop
Copyright © 2011 By Caryl SMuzzey
Jan Can Can
The dance show of sultry young Jan
was given a national ban.
It was found in her dance
she wore no underpants
performing high kicks with *can-can!
Written Oct13, 2016 for Jan's contest!
*Pronunciation is of course American style!
Rock and roll that's my play
Who wants to stay and sway
Don't care if you're footloose
Any music we'll dance and choose
Smiles; grooving fun that we'll display
We met south of the border in Durango,
She was hot and boy could she fandango!
She said at a glance
"Señor like to dance?"
No I replied...but I would love to tango!
Hey all you nice people, got a fantastic idea
Let's party, we could load up on beer and pizza
Maybe dance in the moonlight
While trying to remain upright
In spite of downing six bottles of tequila
© Jack Ellison 2015
Upon the rock of summer that teem
with scissors I forge a winter dream
with paper of white
and visions of flight
each snowflake dance with sunlight gleam
THERE ONCE WAS A GIRL FROM FRANCE
ON THE STREET SHE WOULD SING AND DANCE
ONE DAY THERE WAS SUCH A HUSH
‘CAUSE SHE SHOWED A BIT OF TUSH
WHEN SHE RIPPED OUT THE SEAM OF HER PANTS
There once was a student from Gilroy
Who wanted to marry a tomboy.
But his parents protested
Then had him arrested,
And forced him to join the Bolshoi.
DOWNTOWN WHERE GIRLS DANCE ON POLES
FOR A PRICE THEY’LL BARE THEIR SOULS
THEY’LL SIT ON YOUR LAP
YOU’LL GO FAP FAP FAP
UNTIL YOU LOOSE YOUR CONTROL
The orange flowers attract bumble bees
Yellow and black bees stung my red knees
Dance round flailing and wailing crimson legs
Devilish dimples arose; scratch pegs
Several amber ants stung white toes