Poem Details | by
Andrea Dietrich |
Categories:
funny,
While Ma was away, Pa lost Tweety
while pet-sittin’ for his friend Petey.
Then at dinnertime, Ma
said, “I’m so sorry, Pa,
but this bird I found ain’t very meaty!”
Another time, it was a frickin’
frog he lostWhile pa was lickin’
his chops over dinner,
Ma beamed, “What a winner!
That frog I found tastes just like chickin.”
Another time “Hillbilly Jake”
Asked Pa to please watch his pet snake.
Ma was out of the loop;
saw that snake and made soup.
It was more than her husband could take.
Pa hollered out, “What’s wrong with you?
Every pet I sit ends up as stew!”
“Keep your eye on them critters,
or they’ll end up as fritters.
I’m not here,” Ma said, “runnin’ no zoo.”
|
Poem Details | by
Tim Ryerson |
Categories:
funny,
Diz Cajonne dey call Thibodaux
Paddle dis girl in his Pirogue
Den he see dem unmention
Dad tool stan at attention
She slap him stick HARD doncha' know
Dad pole shrink awful fas he yell whoa!
Sha, whad did you swat dad ting fo?
Now it at parade rest
Like diz bird in a nest
She-say-"I-scared-a'-dem-SNAKE-buddy-ohh!"
PD's contest
|
Poem Details | by
Andrea Dietrich |
Categories:
humorous,
"Oh, honey," he cried on the phone,
"It's terrible being alone.
I'm feeling the blues,
and I have some strange news"
He went on and on with a moan.
"I went to the back yard one day,
not too long after you'd been away.
Do you know what I found
everywhere on the ground?
Can you guess what I'm going to say?"
"No clue," I said"Why don't you share?"
"Dead animals are everywhere!"
If he'd not shouted,
I may have doubted,
but then he said, "Baby, I swear."
I was taken aback, so I said,
"There are animals? And they are dead?
What kind might they be?
Tell me how many?"
Just to think of it gave me some dread.
Since it sounded so terrifying,
I thought what a terrible thing.
Had our yard become scary
like the pet cemetery
I had read of by novelist King?
Were they poisoned? Were there rabbits too?
In the back of my mind I just knew
that his tale was too tall.
I was not wrong at all.
As it turned out, the number was two!
For I called up my daughter who said
she had gone there; what she saw instead
of some big horror show
was just her dad Joe
with one snake and one bird that were dead!
Written July 1, 2016 : True story with a bit of exaggeration making hubbie look wussyBut I'm not far off the mark!! This happened a long time ago when I had gone to a family reunion and left hubbie alone for a week!! Our daughter was newly married and went to the house to see all the "dead animals everywhere" For the Tell a Tall Tale Contest of Jesse Day
|
Poem Details | by
Andrea Dietrich |
Categories:
places, , cute,
To their government Utah is true -
Not just state, but the federal too,
and so with great pride
they display on each side
of their flag the old Red, White and Blue.
Also famous for their industry,
Utah honors the cute bumble bee,
of which I now brag.
Center stage on their flag
is the hive of the bee….naturally!
On Utah’s state flag is an eagle -
The symbol of peace, it is regal!
Pioneers, though, preferred,
a more interesting bird.
Why not on the flag is a seagull?
Most Utahans should know the story.
Long ago, crickets tried to destroy
the crops, till each gull
in Salt Lake ate them all!
That bald eagle has stolen gull’s glory!
Now a monument in Salt lake stands
for the sea gull, and isn’t it grand
that a bird that should be
living nearby the sea
is in love with a dry desert land!
Written by Andrea Dieitrich
July 22, 2015 for the contest of Judy Konos
NOTE: Came back here to say it's Pioneer Day (July 24)Utah is the only state to celebrate itI can hear fireworks outside my house!!
|
Poem Details | by
Robert L. Hinshaw |
Categories:
funny
Cuckoo clocks are quite ornate it is said
But those raucous squawks we suffer with dread
Why could not its designer
Have found a bird much finer
Like a sweet trilling canary instead
Robert LHinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
© All Rights Reserved
Placed No5 in Brian Strand's "Five Lines Down" Contest - May 2011
|
Poem Details | by
RAJAT KANTI CHAKRABARTY |
Categories:
tribute,
My dear friend Connie Marcum Wong planted a rainbow tree
Under Luna's night she wrote a God's Kind Of Poetry
Embracing mother Earth she stood
In life's garden- bird in a wood
Laid golden eggs in silver beds for all of us for free
A Tribute to Connie Marcum Wong,Moon Maiden of Poetry
|
Poem Details | by
JACQUELYN STURGE |
Categories:
funny, happiness,
There once was a guy whose name was Lance
And all this man loved to do was dance,
If you beat on a drum
Or just twiddle your thumb,
Lance would jump up and he'd start to prance.
He danced from morning into the night
He'd leap in air like a bird in flight,
He never got tired
And always was fired,,
Until one day when he lost his sight.
Have you ever seen a blind man dance?
Well it was a sight, that cane and Lance,
He didn't want pity
Though it wasn't pretty,
When he toppled loosing his balance.
He'd jump right up and continue on
And nothing could stop this dancing prawn,
He taught us a lesson
That there is no reason,
To end what you love before you're gone.
|
Poem Details | by
Lin Lane |
Categories:
fun,
Write a limerick of your own about a Muppet
If you post it in a comment or in soup mail to me,
and I find it appropriate, I'll add it on;-)
Sesame Street's Count von Count is dressed in black
He spends his time counting bats and talking smack
This vampy Muppet wears a cape
Skin the color of a ripening grape
Pointy teeth bite your neck when he's ready to attack
There's a Muppet who always wears a striped shirt
So does Ernie, but the one I'm talking about is Bert
He loves Bernice, his pet pigeon
Bert's nose is crooked, just a smidgeon
He's the more serious of the two: Bert the introvert
****************
Tell me more about that messy muncher
who crunches cookies like a real monster!
He talks while he eats,
spurts crumbs round his seat...
Is that why he does not grow much larger?
taai tekai
****************
Here’s a tale about Kermit the frog
When blind drunk he slipped off a wet log
Miss Piggy was forlorn
Her dear ‘Kermie’ was ‘gorn’
Now he’s buried deep in a peat bog
The Swedish chef landed up in jail
In bad trouble no one would pay bail
He’d got a big knife
And butchered his wife
No parole until he's old and frail!
Cookie monster was in a foul mood
She’d found something so bad on her food
A black and white turd
Produced by big bird
When she saw him she said something lewd!
Cookie Monster was curt and concise
She don’t give folks impartial advice
My word she’s a bore
Her word is the law
I don’t think she is really that nice
Jan Allison
*****************
Lin had a crush on old Mr Hooper
Said he was fine when he shook his pooper
In his glasses she'd see
A hidden mystery
behind closed doors said his puppet was super
Tim Smith
*****************
Big Bird got a bit over-zealous
In checking out Miss Piggy's trellis
Oh! Kermit was pained
And thus he remained
Quite furiously green and jealous
Doug Vinson
****************
Miss Piggy was visibly shaken,
In the café where Kermit ate bacon
So she filled him with grog,
Put grease on his log,
Where he fell in the bog and was taken
Ray Gridley
****************
Have sympathy for poor old Beaker
Was given away by his squeaker
Miss Piggy he'd kissed
"You're dead!" Kermit hissed
So raced through the set like a streaker
John Michaels
****************
Not a limerick, but welcomed anyway is this:
Lin Lane, is visibly smart
Sharp as an arrow or dart
Witty and skilled with her art
These Muppets with humor and heart
Encouraging them all to take part
Klio Tsitsikroni
****************
|
Poem Details | by
Dale Gregory Cozart |
Categories:
humor, poetry,
There once was a cranky old parrot
who had all the charms of a ferret.
She went to great ends
to get rid of friends
and now lives in a draft-y garret.
The draft made her sicker and sicker
which caused her to bicker and bicker.
She tried writing verse
which made matters worse
so that she would bicker much quicker!
She couldn't stop coughing and wheezing.
Her vanity there was no pleasing.
The truth of her curse
was no gift for verse
which she blamed on all of the breezing.
This made her get tougher and tougher.
Her verses got rougher and rougher.
She wouldn't stop writing,
but kept on delighting
in making the whole country suffer.
BY DALE GREGORY COZART
The parrot soon dropped off her high perch
From the top of an old silver birch
Now she’s no longer squawking
And her husband is walking
To see the old bird buried in church!
BY JAN ALLISON
|
Poem Details | by
Gail DeBole |
Categories:
bird, fear, growing up,
Posted on 8/20/2013
Updated 8/21/2013
Sobbin’ Robin kept hoppin’ around.
His beak in a downward frown.
First time out of the nest
Unsure of his Baby Bird Quest
His meek chirping was his only sound.
Sobbin’ Robin was too scared to fly.
So scared that he didn’t even try.
He chirped out a loud sigh
That shifted the sky
And a breeze stopped his next chirpy cry.
Unknown to Scared Sobbin’ Robin
Was that Mother Nature kept him hoppin’
When the wind caught his wings
He started to sing
And now flies with birds sans any sobbin'.
|
Poem Details | by
jack horne |
Categories:
animal,
A pet more exotic I'd wanted.
A pet to be groomed and then flaunted.
not a dog or a cat
something cooler than that!
I began my search feeling undaunted
In a pet store I came on a ferret.
Such a pain he was! How did I bear it?
Under doors and through cracks
He'd escape from meAAAACH!!
So I traded him in for a parrot.
Well, the parrot just wanted to fly!
And that bird knew more bad words than I.
When he called me a whore,
I threw open the door:
“Now you’re getting your wish, BirdBYE BYE!
A boa constrictor I bought,
He’d like to be cuddled, I thought,
But he wrapped and he squeezed,
As I gasped and I wheezed,
And offered the rat that I’d caught.
A bowl of piranha I won -
I played Baccarat with a nun -
And they wiggled their bums,
So I tickled their tums,
But bones ’stead of fingers aint fun.
My elderly aunt sent a text,
Suggesting tarantulas next,
But my spider alas,
Took a bite of my ass:
My pet-owning hobby is hexed.
I went to the pet shop, I swear,
But nothing I wanted was there -
To my pets I am prey,
So I went on eBay,
And purchased a big teddy bear.
for Darkness' Grab A Partner collaboration contest, written with a good Soup friend
|
Poem Details | by
Andrea Dietrich |
Categories:
humorous,
A pet more exotic I'd wanted.
A pet to be groomed and then flaunted.
Not a dog or a cat -
Something cooler than that!
I began my search feeling undaunted
In a pet store I came on a ferret.
Such a pain he was! How did I bear it?
Under doors and through cracks
He'd escape from meAAAACH!!
So I traded him in for a parrot.
Well, the parrot just wanted to fly!
And that bird knew more bad words than I.
When he called me a whore,
I threw open the door:
“Now you’re getting your wish, BirdBYE BYE!
A boa constrictor I bought,
He’d like to be cuddled, I thought,
But he wrapped and he squeezed,
As I gasped and I wheezed,
And offered the rat that I’d caught.
A bowl of piranha I won -
I played Baccarat with a nun -
And they wiggled their bums,
So I tickled their tums,
But bones ’stead of fingers aint fun.
My elderly aunt sent a text,
Suggesting tarantulas next,
But my spider alas,
Took a bite of my ass:
My pet-owning hobby is hexed.
I went to the pet shop, I swear,
But nothing I wanted was there -
To my pets I am prey,
So I went on eBay,
And purchased a big teddy bear.
For the "Grab a Partner" ContestTo see
who I collaborated with, read my comment
under the poem.
|
Poem Details | by
Rick Parise |
Categories:
funny,
~
There once was a Bird named Cher
who's resolution was not to swear
she duct taped her beak
where not a word could leak
and fluttered her wings in prayer
~
|
Poem Details | by
john williams |
Categories:
funny,
There was a young man from Tarrot,
Who fed his green bird some carrot,
It preferred it to seed
When it came time to feed,
Now he has a bright orange parrot.
|
Poem Details | by
Sean Kelly |
Categories:
funny,
Said a bee to a bird , we can't fail ,
With your sweet sexy song , bang-in-scale
When I'm lovin' you..please
Don't fart , belch or sneeze
'Cause there might be a sting in the tail
Sean Kelly
|
Poem Details | by
gary bechter |
Categories:
childrenbird, bird, morning,
"Breakfast for two"
Callie the cat
climbed the cypress
curious for something to eat.
Benny the bird
perched on a branch
just a claw out of Callies reach.
Benny the bird
spied a round worm
snaking along the ground.
Few a-ground
went Benny the bird
and chowed the yummy thing down.
Now Benny the bird
sat licking his beak
enjoying his morning treat,
while Callie the cat
planned the attack
for too her morning treat;
Well Benny the bird
no longer around,
to see mornings a-new
For the squiggly round worm
that became a treat
was also breakfast for two...
|
Poem Details | by
harry horsman |
Categories:
Love and the Cook
I asked a simple question
need to know your suggestion
I know that you love me
I know I am your sweet pea
so what’s this indigestion?
Love and the Situation
Honey I think we are sinking
the tides coming in I am thinking
but then love is above all
did I hear a love bird call?
No it’s the sand in my eye winking.
Love and the Goddess
There was a girl from Philadelphia
who suffered from polydipsia
her lover’s advice she did seek
a holiday in ancient Greek
to drink the waters of Hestia.
© Harry J Horsman 2011
|
Poem Details | by
Dawn Gordon |
Categories:
animalshappy, blue, happy,
Today I had the chance to hold "the blue from rio",
A blue bird on a skateboard you should meet and know,
A fancy parrot from the happy meal kid's land,
Preening all his gorgeous feathers on his wheeled stand,
Visit the happy meal site! Join his feathered flow.
|
Poem Details | by
Katherine Stella |
Categories:
childhood, food, children, funny,
< once was an cuckoo bird named Sonny
tagging along gramps as first gunny
shooting up cereal bowls
with dark puffs @@@ nice ~ and ~ slow
Oh how trix rabbit did so runny
Entry For Poets Destroyer 's
Your Favorite Cereal Limerick
GL All
|
Poem Details | by
Paul Schneiter |
Categories:
humor, nature,
Wes Wilson wore a toupee
which cost him a month's pay.
Then one night
it took flight
when spotted by a bird of prey.
|
Poem Details | by
Patricia Sawyer |
Categories:
animals, childhood, children, funny,
Oh there once was a bird in the sky
Till he said " I am Hungry Oh MY!"
He hopped on the ground
Till a fat worm was found
Then he swallowed it up with a sigh.
|
Poem Details | by
Shadow Hamilton |
Categories:
bird,
There was a love bird named Bill
he liked to sun on the sill
himself admiring
he was so charming
until he had a big spill
|
Poem Details | by
Angeline Haikutwinkle |
Categories:
god, inspiration, philosophy,
I gaze at the approaching thunderstorm
and inhale the earthly scent of rainstorm
Her tears
as spears
is like a million blows on human fears
I ponder awhile beneath the lit-up sky
then words start rolling & a prayer is sent up high
I wish for peace
for all fighting to cease
and then the sky beckons with shades of cerise
I loose the heart and soul on mankind
it's easy to lose faith without God's sign
When lost
we toss
the beauty of his creation for lust and greed
Then I witness the miracles of life stories
coincidences that appear and save lives
His wisdom
for our kingdom
is unfathomable for our limited visions
If only we can soar with his visions
Like an eagle on a wind's rhythm!
A mirror response to Mystic Rose's poem below:
I watch the splendor of a shooting star
and breathe the beauty of a hum-guitar
Her light
in flight
is like a million lanterns on a cooling night
I dream awhile beneath the tarp of heaven
then close my eyes & slowly count to seven
I wish in true
for souls renew
and soon I’m covered in night’s dew
I loose the mind and pry his realm
it`s an expedience of God’s mystic dream
When free
I see
the beauty of his creation for all eternity
I watch the splendor of a bird in flight
and breathe the beauty of a blessed night
His wings
they sing
to me of freedom, and all a night can bring;
If only we can learn to sing
Like a Cardinal on a string!
Written by: Mystic Rose
June 24, 2015
|
Poem Details | by
Jack Ellison |
Categories:
silly,
My poor little dickie bird once confided in me
He'd give anything if he could only be free
A zipper, to his chagrin
Keeps dear dickie within
So when I look down he's not staring back at me
© Jack Ellison 2015
|
Poem Details | by
JAN ALLISON |
Categories:
bird, flying, humorous,
I looked at a bird flying high
Its poop landed up in my eye
I looked such a disgrace
As it slid down my face
Folks laughed, but I wanted to cry
FICTION WRITE!
01~06~17
|
Poem Details | by
Robert L. Hinshaw |
Categories:
funny
Robert Lee Hinshaw
If you think this place has no great appeal
Now how in the hell do you think I feel
On my stone let no bird light
If they do clean off the blight
Keep off the grass as at my tomb you kneel
Robert LHinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
© All Rights Reserved
Placed No8 in Andrea Dietrich's "Poetic Epitaph" Contest -October 2010
|
Poem Details | by
Dawn Drickman |
Categories:
funny, life, people,
A friendly poet RavinNVRmore
Writes poetry that you can’t ignore
A Poe fan I wonder
A phrase she did plunder
From the gaunt and ominous bird of yore
|
Poem Details | by
Don Davidson |
Categories:
bird, crazy, earth, fun,
I know a bird who sways and swings
He jumps and kicks and flaps his wings
He cannot fly in stormy weather
He cannot strut his fluffy feathers
So instead he sits and sings.
|
Poem Details | by
olusegun Arowolo |
Categories:
animals, satire, bird, bird,
The bird said to the bee"I am the best",
The bee replied "the best is in my nest",
My sweet waste serves as honey,
as your singing is funny,
buzzing or singing we fly like the rest.
The bird added"though your faeces is sweet",
"I move with my two wings like a fast fleet",
Your sting is very painful;
much annoying and dreadful,
But,we are both dancing to the same beat.
|
Poem Details | by
peter timmins |
Categories:
animals, children, funnybird, bird,
In the long grass on the island of Toomer , lives a great big bird called the oomer boomer
Now this bird is not like any partridge or pheasant, on the whole the boomer is really quite
pleasantIt’s beak is quite long, and it’s wings are quite tiny, and his claws are long and all
skinny and spiny.
But the weirdest thing about this bird, is a noise like something you’ve never heardFor as
the sun rises into the sky, the bird awakes and gives a big sigh.
Then the oomer positions itself on a ledge, with its bum pointing upwards, and its head in the
hedge.
Then it takes a deep breath before it starts, and proceeds to let out a massive great fart.
The fallout from this is felt all over toomer, thank goodness that there’s only one oomer
boomer.
|
Poem Details | by
Dorian Petersen Potter |
Categories:
bird, funny, humorous,
( Limerick)
A big bird from Cantoon could not fly
With his wings spread open he perch'd high
But the branch then just broke
Fell and it wasn't a joke
Thought that he was dead and start'd to cry!
Dorian Petersen Potter
Aka ladydp2000
Copyright@2014
10.4.2014
|
Poem Details | by
Dane Ann Smith-Johnsen |
Categories:
animals, funny, life, nature,
There once was a bird and a bee
They both had a secret, you see.
The bee loved the bird.
She thought it absurd.
The bird, then, decided to flee!
Written for Poetry Soup Member Contest: Birds and the bees
Sponsored by: Royal Trevino
© February 20, 2012
Dane Ann Smith-Johnsen
|
Poem Details | by
Russell Sivey |
Categories:
funny, life, me,
Life’s struggles compounded daily
Whatever ails me, it hurts like crazy
I believe it could be, a little bird and a bee
That came across pretty bad, obviously
Noticing my clothes are not on me
Russell Sivey
Entrant into Tracie's "Make Me Giggle..Make Me Laugh..." contest
|
Poem Details | by
Michael Stebleton |
Categories:
funny
A man once sat at a park bench
When he smelled a peculiar stench
Then right out of the sky
Fell a whopping bird pie
The man's wore a hat ever since
|
Poem Details | by
penny kauffman |
Categories:
happiness, inspirational, life, old,
Once along time ago, when I was only 3,
I was sitting on my lawn, and a bird sat on
my knee, He sang a song of Au tum , and then went
his merry way,I often stop and think about ,that very
spec ail dayFor I swore I saw that same old bird sitting
on my lawn and he was singing and singing that same
old lovely song.
Did he know who I was ?
Did he remember me?
Did he know that years ago
He sat upon my kn
|
Poem Details | by
Dane Ann Smith-Johnsen |
Categories:
socialslam, poetry, slam,
No event! No audience! Brain spasm!
Is it fun for the sponsor that has 'em?
Folks numerically judge.
Presentations with grudge -
Slam without performance is a chasm.
How in cyberspace can one perform his poem?
Can U-tube audiences judge random?
There must be an event.
That is the slam intent.
Otherwise, it becomes aimless, gruesome.
There once was a poet who disliked slam.
She slammed anyway while eating eggs and ham.
I was told by a bird -
She got choked on her word.
Too bad it was not performed for the cam!
© July 21, 2010
Dane Smith-Johnsen
A SPECIAL THANKS GOES TO OUR POETRY SOUP TEAM for their continued support of the art of poetry in all of its forms and for their sensitivity to the needs of poets on Poetry Soup SLAM POETRY is about performance It is about beliefs and opinions...NOT just about dissing Some SLAM Poetry is purely beautiful I visited the link posted on their recent blog http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=8723097898466379752# It was a marvelous experience SMILES
|
Poem Details | by
DON JOHNSON |
Categories:
adventure,
Royal Trevino
Contest Name
Birds and the bees
Good ole Clive he said to me,
Bee’s aint buzzing decently,
Mobile phones got their number,
Buzz like a bent cucumber,
broody bird said recently.
Don Johnson
|
Poem Details | by
charles hice |
Categories:
childhood, children, funny, parody,
FabelFortyFive
FabelFortyFive
CharlaXFabels
This Limmerick
There was an Old Lady she hailed from Nantucket
She carried her fish in a red paisley bucket
She wore her hair up in a honeybun
She thought it made her quite the looking young
The Pelican came with a busted wing
The Old Lady was trying to catch it
She chased and she chased and she chased it
She carried a stick made of glass
She has lippstick it is gloss
She applies it to snakes and scorpions
The glass stick not the lipp gloss
She makes a poor lump of it
The lipp gloss is read like two lips
Tulips is many and varied in hue
She walks in the way of the shrew
She carries her stick to save birds
The bird not the woman in the shoe
That was Old Mother Hubbard
She has tea in her cupboard
The Nantucket not Hubbard
She makes it in gold bullion cubes
The tea not the shoes
Millions of bags are hidden away
Shoe bags not tea bags
she has shoes for her children
Yes Hubbard
In the Cubbard
The teas are all black and some green
The shoes are all pink
Her children are blue
The Lady from Nan not the Shoe lady too
The dog eats better than the yew
A bone from the woman
Hubbard not Joan
There was an old woman from Nantucket
Joan Hubbard was from Shoe Rhode Island
She kept teas in the millions
The Nantucket lady not Hubbard
|
Poem Details | by
JAN ALLISON |
Categories:
body, humorous, lust,
A rampant old bird called Caitlin
Prepared for a long night of sin
Bill made it his mission
And got in position
But sobbed when she asked ‘is it in’
Bill said you’ve no right to be fussy
You’ve got such a cavernous pussy
Let’s admit we are old
But we try to be bold
You were once a right little hussy!
Thanks to Chris Green for inspiration for the second stanza!
04~24~17
|
Poem Details | by
Md Shahadat Hossain |
Categories:
beauty, bird, food, humor,
The Magpie bird sings wonderfully,
Even it can dance nicely.
Once she saw a grasshopper,
Her heart bit was getting louder,
She caught that grasshopper softly.
|
Poem Details | by
Victor Alexander |
Categories:
bible,
SOLOWISE
Traceable son of Adam
Blood-lined to royalty; heir apparent to the throne
He has everything easy for him as he pleases
Amongst different choices, he chose wisdom first
The elders said he was humble and not greedy
Maybe the greedy and the arrogant would have chosen differently
The righteous praises him for his act of righteousness
God admired his spirit of selflessness and simplicity
In such surprise; he was blessed with added gifts
To him who has; more shall be given.
Just as the bird can’t beg for wings to fly
The fish can’t wish to swap water for land
He couldn’t ask for what he already has that is his right
Many would do anything just to be a king’s son
An opportunity the fowl would embrace to be a raven
By being that which we wish; we are satisfied
If not completely; at least to a measurable degree
A bastard born of royalty in royalty blood
If my father is rich, powerful, prosperous and respected
I the son, am the same; I am my father’s son.
Grant me one wish
I will make the one wish no one would
Yet, I asked for that I do not have
To be king, I am the richest
Being king, I am most powerful
Being king, I will need many advisers
Why have so many advisers; when I can have wisdom
Being king guarantees me no wisdom that is mine
To have that I don’t have; I could only ask for it
That in itself is wisdom.
Lordvip
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Poem Details | by
Tim Ryerson |
Categories:
funny, life
A foot-long-strand-of-hair is one of my fears
So I sharpen and oil up my trimming shears
Ev'ry organ that senses
Gets pruned to the fences
Ain't no bird gonna' nest in THIS old man's ears....
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Poem Details | by
NEILL MOCKETT |
Categories:
animals, children, funny,
Leaping off a garden fence
There is a frog called Lily
She has very little sense
There isn’t one more silly
Leaping up without a care
Lily reaches for the sky
Hear that silly frog declare
Like a bird see how I fly!
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Poem Details | by
Russell Sivey |
Categories:
life, nature,
I think that the birds and the bees are bad
A bird would avoid the bee just a tad
For a bee would really sting
And hurt that flying thing
Avoiding the bee is it’s best iron-clad
Russell Sivey
Entrant into Royal Trevino's "Birds and the bees" contest
2/15/2012
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Poem Details | by
Skye When |
Categories:
nature,
There was a little girl in a coat.
Singing in a lonely boat
A bird was attracted to her bread,
And the girl smiled and said,
"I shall build you a little cote."
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Poem Details | by
James Horn |
Categories:
humorous,
Humming Bird Nest
Some women seem to be obsessed
With size of both of their breasts
And microscopic her's had been
Supported by only some thin skin;
Tiny as eggs in a hummingbird nest.
Those of her friend's were a dandy
For breast feeding came in handy
She surely was so well endowed
Saw each one and was very proud
When on beach became all sandy.
Another woman's were monstrous
Which we thought was preposterous
Appeared that she was one of the few
Who like her's would grew on you
Unless looked like a tyrannosaurus.
James Thesarious Hilarious Horn
Retired Veteran and Poet
Here a breast, there a breast
Everywhere a nice breast
Unless they are compressed
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Poem Details | by
JAN ALLISON |
Categories:
bird, food, humorous,
Mum roasted a ptarmigan for tea
But the meal didn't satisfy me
It was a scrawny old bird
The taste was pretty absurd
So I'm off to the chip shop quickly!
On Monday I was using a random word generator and it came up with Ptarmigan which is a word I had never heard ofI've since discovered it's a bird which is native to Canada but they can also be found in Scotland
06-17-17
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Poem Details | by
James Horn |
Categories:
allegory, analogy,
Song Bird Sang Soft Sweet Refrain
While we went for ride on a train in Spain,
Single song bird sang a soft, sweet refrain;
We would yearn,
One day to return;
Our soul and spirit forever there did remain.
Jim Horn
Always would make me wonder,
What below earth is down under,
And above lightening and thunder;
Having been born from a blunder;
God saved those who were put asunder.
Greet Then Desire to Meet
Many people we eventually did meet;
Each of them we had wanted to greet;
Were incorrigible,
And deplorable;
What we had read in a Trump tweet.
Trump knew Flynn had lied and most
of his supporters were losersThe rest
were loyal Republicans.
Jim Horn
Fine Poem Is Mine
Did discover each poem was forever fine,
And poets did define them as being mine;
Have been behooving,
An experience moving;
Are divine and can read while you do dine.
Chase A Mental Case Out of Office
Found incorrigible has been Trump's base;
Our President we found with an ugly face;
Had orange hair,
And hard to bare;
Out of office should chase the mental case.
To Trump Should Propose
Why anyone in right mind Trump chose,
This I personally would like to propose;
Do get rid of,
And out shove;
Lies made him grow a gargantuan nose.
The truth will make us free and free up
a lot of things.
Personally Are Petrified
With Trump we are personally petrified;
Looks like as usual he has lied and lied;
Low does stoop;
A nincompoop;
On a rail out of office force him to ride.
With Trump we surely should denounce,
And weigh all of the bull by each ounce;
Item collected,
And misdirected;
On all of his stupidity start to pounce.
By God me again He personally directed;
Check out tax returns and have inspected;
We must admit,
Is half of a wit;
So sadly Trump as prisoner was selected.
After Trump being President for short while;
On him should see what they have on file.
To God Devoted
To God I always have been devoted;
Received with honor and promoted;
I was wishing,
To go fishing;
Down river with him I have boated.
Jim Horn
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Poem Details | by
Aniruddha Pathak |
Categories:
humor,
In a jiffy
You be feather light— not just leafy,
Scarce still a spot kiss in a jiffy,
Unless a bird of flight
Racing as speeds up light;
Which, if not all too false, is iffy.
____________________________________________________
In physics and chemistry a jiffy is equal to about 33.3504 picosecondsNow, to reach anywhere in a jiffy one must travel one centimetre faster than the speed of light
_________________________________________________________
Humour | 13.03.2017 |
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Poem Details | by
Sandison Jumbo |
Categories:
funny, humorous,
Miracle dinner
Benny had gambled away his last buck
Hungry and couldn't believe his ill luck
He fell down and prayed
His neighbour's bird strayed
For dinner, he had a dish of roast duck!
July 2, 2017
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