Limerick Poems About The Beach | Beach Limerick Poems
Poem Details | by Andrea Dietrich |
Categories: funnywords,

The Fisher of Men

On the beach strolled a woman - ambitious!
She spied a man fishing - delicious!
“Ohhhh, your arms are so strong
and your rod is so long
I bet you catch hundreds of fishes!”

The fisherman looked with surprise
at this beautiful girl with blue eyes.
With words loved by men
she kept reeling him in,
for she always could spot a good prize!

Flirting words and a magical look
were her bait, and that’s all that it took!
The cute gal got her wish,
and if all men were fish,
all the best ones would be on her hook!



Poem Details | by James Fraser |
Categories: family, happiness, nature, places,

Barefoot on the Beach

The days of Summer are here
On this beautiful earth sphere
This season of shine
The beach we do pine
Our time to appear draws near

The day we have awaited has arrived
To the seaside we carefully drive
The kids and their daddy
Singing Showaddywaddy
The excitement in us now thrives

In adventure they play on the dunes
Through the reeds the breeze plays a tune
A symphony so grand
As I'm barefoot on the sands
On this glorious sunny afternoon

For these days of Summer cheer us all
As the sounds of happy kids en-thrall
Our day is now ended
As darkness has descended
My kids and I had a ball







Poem Details | by Matthew Horstkotter |
Categories: nature,

The Beach at Midnight

The stars so bright
On this moonlit night
The waves roll to shore
Nights like this I want more
The beach at midnight


Poem Details | by john williams |
Categories: beach, for children, summer,

Too Excited

My swimmers on, to the beach I ran,
Across the hot, white, squirming sand,
The first wave faced knocked me rotten,
My dad had told me but I'd forgotten,
Jump the waves son if you can.


Poem Details | by Andrea Dietrich |
Categories: funny, giggle,

Iguana

One day with her pet lizard, on a
warm beach lay the sex goddess Shawna.
One who ogled her bust
tried to claim he was just
enthralled by her lovely iguana!

For john freeman's Giggle 2 Contest


Poem Details | by Andrea Dietrich |
Categories: girlfriend,

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun

If your love life's a beach with no sun,

here's some dating advice 1 0 1.

Don't be boring or stern -

Pay attention and learn

this one thing: Girls just wanna have fun!



WRitten July 1, 2015 for the Triple Threat Poetry Contest of Casarah Nance


Poem Details | by Jimmy Anderson |
Categories: funny

Oh What A Love

The good looking dish and the man.
Were standing in surf on the sand.
   Her hand it did rest.
   Upon this man's chest.
Their eyes meeting as best they can.

They were wed on the beach it is true.
With such a big party and crew.
   Sweetheart from the soup
   took Ron from the group.
Two became one as winds blew!

They're happy as newly weds are.
Making love out under a star.
   They'll come back to earth
   when she does give birth.
To a miracle childOh my, by far!


picture   ps__JT76969-Edit.jpg

Written for Sweetheart's Loveland Limerick contest by Jimmy Anderson


Poem Details | by Dane Ann Smith-Johnsen |
Categories: funny,

Accepting the Bulge

She went to the beach with a blanket.
Her fat all around...could not tuck-it.
String bikini and sand
Covered less than her hand.
Her spouse hid his head in a bucket.

Revised and reposted for Andrea's Limerick Contest


Poem Details | by James Fraser |
Categories: funnybeach, love,

On a Whim, we Swim

Sitting by the beach one summers day
I turned to my girlfriend to say
Shall we go for a swim
It's cold not too grim
Splish splashing in love do we play

Two bodies now exit the cold blue
Only one of us appears to be true
Now shapely and pert
Her body so alert
My desire is now to pursue

To the beach towel she says on the turn
My love you've turned into a worm
The cold water has spoken
At least it's a token
When warmed I'm sure it will squirm










http://www.thehighlanderspoems.com/humour-5.php


Poem Details | by John Squires |
Categories: beach, fishing,

Fisher McBride

On the beach sat the fisher McBride
With his pole in a stand by his side
Then suddenly he had a big bite
And his pole took off into flight
Up he sprang, his mouth open wide


Poem Details | by faleshia murphy |
Categories: funnyhome, home,

SCHOOL'S OUT

Well here we are the last day of school
Let's hit the beach the park and even the pool
The kids are home for the summer
As I start to think I begin to wonder
They going to be home with me hey that's not cool


Poem Details | by Andrea Dietrich |
Categories: funny,

Suz and Shawna's Cruise

The dancing all night was what Suz
loved most about taking a cruise.
In her beautiful gown
she felt very let down,
for she'd packed only tennis shoes!

The next day a big lizard on a
warm beach crawled on Suz's friend Shawna.
Guys who ogled her bust
tried to say they were just
enthralled by the lovely iguana.


For john freeman's Boisterous Comedy Poetry Contest


Poem Details | by kurtis scott aka curtis futch jr |
Categories: adventure, dance, places,

HAVE SOME FUN

no doudt get out
stop beening along
go to rome
fine where you belong
go  dance prance
go to the beach run
lay in the sun
HAVE SOME FUN


Poem Details | by john williams |
Categories: for children, funny, humorous,

Go Beryl

 Beryl, a beach girl of some girth,
Was paddling for all she was worth,
     Her face looked so stark
     Being chased by a shark,
As she battled to get out of the surf.


Poem Details | by Paul Callus |
Categories: fun, sleep,

Vacation Slumber


I booked a vacation with a friend
We found a beach haven – sun and sand
The journey by train cost a song
We slept as the miles went along
Woke up at the end in no man’s land.

-----------------------------------------------

Paul Callus ~ 22nd July 2014 
Contest: Vacation Humour
Sponsor: Carolyn Devonshire
Placing: 3rd


Poem Details | by Carolyn Devonshire |
Categories: animals, funny

Bait and Switch

No tugs at his line; it just goes limp
Mighty fisherman feels like a wimp
     Looking back at his bait box
     Wasn’t prepared for the shock
A gull flew off with one of his shrimp

I was talking to an elderly gent who was fishing from shore in Ormond Beach and this 
actually happened as he was giving me "fishing instructions."  We had a good laugh watching 
the seagull steal the bait!


Poem Details | by catherine Reinke |
Categories: lovesea, me, sea,

A Seagull Named Steve

A Seagull Named Steve

This seagull flew by and sat a bit
Ordered tequila from  a wine glass sipped.

Dressed in bright yellow
Such a delight social fellow,

Conversation made easy
In beach sands breezy.

A Jonathon   Living indeed
Spreading his light giving sea diving seeds.

At first to me, a dive he did make
Up to the sun in restoration with me he did take.

In buttons of coco bean seed
I find my self hand in hand with he I need.

Washed away my blues
Into happiness hues
Of bright orange and yellow.

Across the ocean in search of loves notion
Conjured a passion sea foam potion

Potentate hurricane insane commotion.

But swirl in heavens bright blue skies
In the night full moon we did fly.

For a need for both fulfillment deep
Never to be forgotten not even in sleep.

As quickly he came this seagull named Steve
From no love forever to maybe make me believe.


But try I did truly beg him not to leave
My Jonathan  Living seagull named Steve.

Yet he is gone to other seagull endeavors
Living his life among castles of pleasures.

Me
He did not leave
For in my heart
He created I think
A new start.


Poem Details | by jeffry cohan |
Categories: angst, health,

FREE CEE one or two of the six people who will read this might find it humorous

                          WAVE THE WAVES GOODBYE
there once was a beach in beleze
upon which a girl begged me "please"
so i put my hand
where nature had planned
and that's how i got this disease
  (c) copy write PHREEPOETREE ~free cee!~


Poem Details | by John lawless |
Categories: humor, men, drug,

SURF'S UP - for contest

SURF'S UP

It drug the beach sand making trenches
causing lightheaded fainting of wenches
the ocean was icy
he stood out quite nicely
even after allowing for shrinkage.



2/19/2016

submitted to – Limerick Contest II – for fun – Poetry Contest
sponsor – Jan Allison


Poem Details | by Dane Ann Smith-Johnsen |
Categories: funny, people

Accepting the Bulge

She went to the beach with a blanket.
Fat all around; she would not tuck-it.
String bikini and sand
Covered less than her hand.
Her husband hid his head in a bucket.

Reposted for Poetry Soup Member Contest: ANY FUNNY POEM 	
Sponsored by: ¥ Destroyer ¥ Poet

© Dane Ann Smith-Johnsen
May 22, 2010


Poem Details | by Faye Gibson |
Categories: funny, marriage, vacation,

Honeymoon Vacation

Just a honeymoon beach vacation,
a fine nuptial love celebration;
   we arrived a night early,
   we would find hotel surely:
“No rooms” was the sad proclamation.

“An hour away you might find one.”
They were right for we only found…NONE!!
  We got off beaten path.
  too tired then to laugh,
looked for a place “mom and pop” run.

Well, it must have been close to midnight,
exhausted the lady and her knight;
  we found Motel Warwick,
  a guest house illicit,
and christened our honeymoon site.

Copyright, July 13, 2014
Faye Lanham Gibson


Poem Details | by Howard Tunick |
Categories: humor,

A Rising Tide For Contest

There once was a climate change doubter
He really was quite a shouter
Until late one night
The high tide just right
Found the beach house he loved under water

24 December 2015 


Poem Details | by Miss Wattle |
Categories: beach,

MANLY BEACH

MANLY BEACH There's a beautiful beach named Manly I once used to swim there, oh, daily O'er the waves I would frolic Get dumped and mutter "Bollocks!" Damn that beautiful beach named Manly. c ELR 2013


Poem Details | by Dane Ann Smith-Johnsen |
Categories: funny

Accepting the Bulge

Accepting the Bulge

She went to the beach with a blanket.
Fat all around; she would not tuck-it.
String bikini and sand
Covered less than her hand.
Her husband hid his head in a bucket.

1st place win in Carolyn’s Limerick Contest.


© Dane Ann Smith-Johnsen
May 22, 2010
Poetic form:  Limerick



Poem Details | by Jack Ellison |
Categories: fun,

The Beach Ballet



In a distant land many miles away Lived a hermit who dilly dallied all through the day When it came time for slumber He resorted to counting numbers Of young lasses showing asses part of the beach ballet © Jack Ellison 2015


Poem Details | by mike dailey |
Categories: romance,

Little Robin Redbreast

There once was this redbreasted Robin
Who there on the beach was just sobbin’
That sunburn must hurt
It glowed right through her shirt
The view set my parts just a throbbin’


Poem Details | by Gerard Keogh Jr. |
Categories: animals, funeral, satire, thank

Just Ask And It Shall Be Given.

This Club Med lagoon really holds the heat,
with a beach front view and a coral suite.
But the best of all
as we watch it fall
is how they serve up each meal on a sheet!


Poem Details | by Tahera Mannan |
Categories: funny

Loveland Romance

There was once a blonde from Jersey
Looked like a flamboyant gypsy
Married an Italian
A pure bred stallion
Now the couple looked most sexy

They honeymooned in Italy
Walked the pristine beach daily
With flowers in hand
This way they had planned
To enjoy this short life gaily

ps__JT76858-Edit.jpg
By- Tahera Mannan


Poem Details | by James Fraser |
Categories: funny

Beach Beauty

My eyes nearly popped out of my head
On the beach she was tanned and spread
    Then a shadow appeared
    Oops, her husband i feared
I'm now looking at steaks instead





http://www.thehighlanderspoems.com/humor.php


Poem Details | by Tom Wright |
Categories: funny

Fast Food

There was a young man from North Park,
Who would swim near the beach after dark.
The move of the ocean
Always set him in motion,
Until the night he became dinner for a shark








Poem Details | by RAJAT KANTI CHAKRABARTY |
Categories: fun, funny,

Jane has a big house

                                           Jane has a big house 
                                         Made of cats and mouse 
                                           When they all screech 
                                             She runs for beach 
                                        Stripping skirt and blouse


Poem Details | by John Smith |
Categories: places,

Chicago


I like to spend time in Chicago  
on old Oak Street beach along Lago 
Michigan There I can
watch girls tan and hear a man 
talk of his windy city long ago 


Poem Details | by Doris Culverhouse |
Categories: seasea, sea,

Jeckyll Island

There once was a boy from Jeckyll Island Sound
He roamed the beach and in the sand he found
A sea shell, a snorkel
A buried grand paw and a shovel
Adventure awaits in the sand mound.


For the sea tale limerick contest!!
~~~Ninth place win in the contest!!~~~~


Poem Details | by Susan Palli |
Categories: inspirational,

Sandy Saves Dandy Randy

There was an old codger named Randy
Who rolled on the beach and got sandy.
T'was there he did sleep,
And ne'er did he weep,
So sure that his life was just dandy.

Along came a lady named Sandy
Who wanted so much to help Randy
To soften his heart,
She played a big part,
And stopped him from drinking his brandy.

Then Randy got quickly awake,
So stunned when he saw his mistake.
He thought no one cared
Because no one dared
To love him for his own name's sake.

He quickly got up from his stupor
And started to be a good trooper.
He went to help others
Who didn’t have mothers,
and now his life's work is just super.


Revised: 
January 8, 2016





Poem Details | by Jemmy Farmer |
Categories: love

Lover's Gin

While I was sat drinking lemonade
the winter’s chilling sun started to fade
the calm before the storm 
perhaps another dawn
found in fizzy dreams of lemonade.

A hazy moonlit beach then appeared
my senses numbing as I had feared
as a pretty girl winked
at me, I dare not blink
in case she then went and disappeared.

The summer bronze reflected on her skin
her jewel like eyes just drank me in
an orchid in my gaze
to banish winter days
and I was caught in a lover’s gin.


Poem Details | by Jack Ellison |
Categories: fun,

Dressing Me With Their Eyes



Heard an old lady at the beach utter these words “Men were dressing me with their eyes” how absurd Not a real good looker A “seen better days” ex-hooker Line between beauty and age has become quite blurred


Poem Details | by Jack Ellison |
Categories: fun,

The Beach Ballet



In a distant land many miles away Lived a hermit who dilly dallied all through the day When it came time for slumber He resorted to counting numbers Of young lasses showing asses part of the beach ballet


Poem Details | by connie pachecho |
Categories: allusion, beach, beautiful, love,

He Played Sweet Music

He Played Sweet Music



he kept following her path of petals of roses in the sand
when he met her v in the beach he called out the marching band
the pianist in him played a few moves
but it was his tuba that got her groove
when he left the beach a crescendo of cloudburst hit land

connie pachecho

2/10/17


Poem Details | by David Pekrul |
Categories: humor, humorous,

Heather's Feathers

There was a young lassie named Heather,
Who played on the beach in hot weather,
She thought it a sin,
Just dressed in her skin,
So covered herself with three feathers.

II

Remember the beach-babe named Heather?
Who covered herself in three feathers?
The boys were aware,
And started to stare,
So now she wears tight shiny leather.

The following is not a limerick, but it continues the story of Heather's Feathers

III

‘Twas a fine use of leather,
On our girl named Heather,
For the boys had to be on a tether.
But leather made Heather
Break out in hot weather,
So now she is back to the feathers.

Now, back to the limericks

IV

Our sweet northern princess named Heather,
Is hooked on a new kind of feather,
It is not from a moose,
It’s Canadian Goose,
So cozy in all kinds of weather.

V

Our Canadian Heather’s a Newfy,
Which to most of us sounds kind of goofy,
But to those from the “Rock”,
She’s the belle of the docks,
With her feathers all ruffled and poofy.

VI

Our Heather has moved to the prairies,
She’s tired of travelling on ferries,
She’s now wearing loafers
And chasing poor gophers,
Which makes her all sweaty and weary.

And now for the conclusion to our story (in rhyme)

VII

Oh, Heather, dear Heather,
What became of your feather,
The last one you had left to dance in,
For the two had been sold,
As the story was told*,
And the last one was held up for ransom.

Some bikers in leather,
Kidnapped our dear heather,
And wanted ten grand to return her,
Let there be no mistake,
She's a lovely 'cheesecake',
But I haven't the money to earn her.

So I made up a plan,
'Twas a bit of a scam,
When I told them I'd pay for my Heather,
So it must have been fate,
When I broke down their gate,
Took my Heather and left them the feather.

Now I have my dear Heather,
Who is plucked of her feather,
And I haven't the money to buy one,
But she says it's okay,
Says she likes it this way,
For the boys in town call her 'The Nude One'.

*That's another story for another time.


Poem Details | by James Horn |
Categories: humorous,

Humming Bird Nest

Humming Bird Nest

Some women seem to be obsessed
With size of both of their breasts
And microscopic her's had been
Supported by only some thin skin;
Tiny as eggs in a hummingbird nest.

Those of her friend's were a dandy
For breast feeding came in handy
She surely was so well endowed
Saw each one and was very proud
When on beach became all sandy.

Another woman's were monstrous
Which we thought was preposterous
Appeared that she was one of the few
Who like her's would grew on you
Unless looked like a tyrannosaurus.

James Thesarious Hilarious Horn
Retired Veteran and Poet

Here a breast, there a breast
Everywhere a nice breast
Unless they are compressed


Poem Details | by David Pekrul |
Categories: humor,

The Man In A Speedo

I knew of a man from Toledo,
Who laid on the beach in a Speedo,
No muscles he had,
It really was sad,
He had no physique nor libido.

He watched all the slim, pretty girls,
The ones with their hair in small curls,
But nothing he felt,
Down south of his belt,
He saw them as oysters, not pearls.

But that's when he saw pretty Lucy,
The sight of her frame made him goosey,
Libido is back,
They're both in the sack,
The rest of this story's too juicy!