Tom sat there eating the last of his bread,
wondering if the next day he'd get fed,
felt like a dumb cluck,
down on his luck,
till a light went off the top of his head
Young Shakespeare didst say to his tutor,
"Methinks I wouldst be much astuter,
And per chance, I wouldst say,
Mightest write a screen play,
If some fool wouldst invent the computer."
Chocolate goes straight to the heart
Its the Food of Love off the chart
But truth be told
It makes Jan bold
To squeeze out a real skunky fart
The Boston Tea Party was hip
Until Jan herself let one rip
The tea went first
The Captain cursed
And the crew cried, "Abandon ship!"
All emotions and hopes exchanging through a common fax
singing songs of victory and toasting a beer to relax
priding on a rich history
moving in one chemistry
mock us when we lose and face the inevitable axe.
March forth Macduff, your sword to smite.
The head of a king for your requite!
Ten years he has reigned
with innocence feigned.
Greed and slaughter his ultimate blight!
He came dead last at West Point in his class,
led his men to Little Big Horn en masse.
But it was Custer who fell
and Crazy Horse they tell
was from that day on known as Kicking A$$!
Limerick: Once the Great Grandson of Queen Victoria
Once the great grandson* of Victoria
Heir to the throne of tsarist Russia
Saved by “Doc” Rasputin
Killed by Lenin-Stalin
Lo! Heir to Queen Vic’s haemophilia!
*Tsarevich Alexei of the Romanov royal house.
© TWignesan – Paris, 2013
When the apple dropped on Sir Newton's bean,
He cursed naughty words making quite a scene!
He was somewhat placated,
When to him 'twas related,
He'd found gravity, wholly unforeseen!
Robert LHinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
(c) 2015 All Rights Reserved
Robespierre, Danton and all of those
crazy French revolution 'heroes'
had thousands guillotined
by La Machine that gleaned
heads; then 'offed' their own midst their wild throes.
There once was a Fawkes name of Guy
Whose dastardly plans went awry
Now in November
We still remember
And take pleasure in watching him fry
see about poem
All the reptiles gathered round
When Elmer the frog hopped into town.
There never was such bloated glee
As Elmer croaked his history,
Then from his pad fell and drowned.
Harriet Tubman helped free slaves
Determination gave her the strength
To break the law
And have slaves crawl
Through tunnels to make their escape -
She risked her life every day
Added additional line at end
An ancestor known as, "Miss Lottie"
Was a New York socialite "hottie"
To her lasting disgrace
She slapped Paul Revere's face
When he invited her to the p-ah-ty
One of the greatest mysteries in the history of man
Why kamikaze pilots wore helmets, they didn't give a damn
For the Emperor, they cried
They were prepared to die
Unimaginable to us but for the glory of Japan
Ah, If Columbus had not sailed
for America: the new land,
cigarettes wouldn't kill
those feeling the chill...
many would be alive, not dead!
Against humanity, history badly plot
creating a stain not easy to face the blot
humans really nefarious
to schedule of events, massacre has a spot.
Coventry's Lady Godiva goes
side saddle, naked from head to toes;
her blonde hair down to there,
and her bottom all bare,
'cause farmers pay taxes through the nose.
it seems like i study alot
and history most have forgot
if we never learn
our planet will burn
educationour only shot
Prescott Bush proved his moxie
as war-profiteer proxy
with brother Harriman
since shame can't bury them
when suggestions turn Nazi.
Twin babies lifted very high
Beauties would draw many a sight
What if they sagged way down
Not good sight around town
Without lift they've gone awry
Contest: Limericks Hilarious
Sponsor: John Freeman
Click on: " About This Poem"
King George was feeling so sad
His doctors said he was mad
Despite his long rule
He just looked a fool
No wonder the poor man went mad
7th May 2015
Once there was a man called Vetti Nayagam, the speaker
This speaker knows history, geography, epics, ethics, linguistics and more
How to run a family? Author speaker
How to win an election? Author speaker
Bloody Nayagam gentlemen are no cold fish, peace lovers !
In History, Nelson fought the Spanish
This powerful Armada did vanish
My ancestor was in thrall
Kismet Hardy had a ball
No invasion, the infidels, banished
They are spending each last printed dollar.
They ignore us out here who still holler:
"Better tighten your belt,
or what might be felt
is the noose slipping under your collar."
Henry VIII desireth an heir.
Wife after wife, nary son hath wives bourne.
Thusly, he cut off each head.
Findeth a new wife instead.
His sole son hath been born from an affair.